Heartbreaker

Prologue

It all began on February 14, 2013. Valentine's Day, or rather the death of part of my heart and mind. In our school, red hearts were hung in the corridors, and love quotes from books or songs were attached to the boards. The whole hall gave a beautiful felling, like in fairy tales or romantic comedies. Firmly holding the navy backpack hanging on my shoulder, I was heading quickly towards to the school library. Looking from time, you have hardly found science there. Rather big lesson of sex life. Every well-known school couple would come there during or after class, behind the last cabinet with books, to have some fun. Well, in those years, I did not know the taste of this pleasure. Unfortunately, I wasn't the skinniest person. I weighed almost a hundred kilos and the only person who wanted to come hang out with me was Brooke. A mean bitch who has no right to be called my friend anymore. For those interested of what happened. She was friends with me only to laugh. She was also Bradley Will Simpson girlfriend also known as the love of my life. Or rather as ... school love of my life. Since I saw him in Class 130, my heart beat in a different way. From then on, I believed that he was the one. Nobody suspected my interest in him. I was rather invisible to people. Even Brooke herself didn't suspect it. I went with her to each of his matches, explaining that I did not want to leave her alone. Of course, knowing that a whole bunch of Bradley fangirls only come here with same intentions like me. Watching him discreetly. He was like a god to me. As if someone creating him, slightly made a mistake and added a little more perfection to the bag. Sometimes sitting with a blonde at a canteen table I could sit near him. I could see him as close as ever. Of course it wasn't so often. I spent my lunch breaks eating under a tree. I knew about my "friend" reputation and didn't want to destroy it. Deep in my heart I wanted to sit with them. Although, I was more dying to sit with them. From this distance I could see things I couldn't normally. As his hair fell sometimes at his eyes so he had to fix it. A scar on his neck from an accident on a board next to hickey's made last night by Brooke. I literally had him at my fingertips, but I couldn't get him anyway. Just like almost the entire female part of the school. Brad was different, or so I thought. He was always smiling, kind (for his friends), funny and romantic. His girlfriend whenever she could tell how he bought her flowers last night, how he took her for a ride in his car, or to a restaurant. I envied her deeply in my soul. I wanted to be at her place. To have a chance for a minute. So I bet on one card. Literally. It was our last year at school. My last chance. I liked him for four years. At the end I had to try. That's why, with a red card decorated with glitter and a declaration of my love for him, I was heading to the library door. As every year, the council of students put up a large box next to the library door for Valentine's Day. Everyone anonymously or not could toss Valentine for everyone, where later someone would go through whole school and give it away. Of course, unfortunately I never got any of them, but that was my chance. I had to take a step towards him. At the end. I took a red heart from the back of my backpack and looked at it with a moment's hesitation. It was the moment where I should have escaped. Throw it out and never think about it again. But I took a deep breath and dropped Valentine with Bradley name into the pink box. Unfortunately, our school is like the FBI or another James Bond. There are spies everywhere. So of course, seeing me with a red heart next to the Valentine's card box, the message reached the school elite like an express. I never thought a math lesson could break me like that. Three girls knocked on the door, who were on the student council with a big box in their hands. In turn, they began to walk on the benches handing out individual cards. They missed my as usual, but I didn't care much. My heart was beating like never before, and cold sweat flooded my stress. I turned my head back where he was sitting on the last bench. He looked at each girl with a smile. Finally it was his turn and the girls spilled over thirty cards from the box. He looked at it all with amusement, getting a hit to the side from his friend Gilbert. In stress, I bit my lip and started playing with the sleeve of the green sweater, expecting any movement on his part towards my card. At one point one of the girls leaned over him showing a large part of the bust, grabbed my card in her hand and whispered something in his ear while looking at me centrally. After a moment he looked at me and frowned. I knew it was my end. Not because he looked at me and my body suddenly melted. No, I died because I was so stupid to believe that this look gave me hope of mutual feelings. After a second, he started laughing loudly, along with his friend and girlfriend, who was still bent over the desk. Immediately my heart collapsed. All the excitement fell into the a byss of darkness, from which there is no way out. Only his laughter of contempt was reflected in my head. The first tears began to appear in my eyes, so not wanting to see them I turned quickly to the blackboard, trying to calm down. I could not. It was my damn four-year love, I couldn't get him out of my mind like that. The surroundings began to spill, and the first salty tears began to flow down on my pink cheeks. Not even knowing in my chest I felt a grip. I'm pretty sure it was my broken heart. It was like a hit from a truck, crushing my heart with a shoe on a concrete floor. I felt like trash. Even for those four years, hearing the voices behind me, talking about my weight were not as painful as what I saw. I wanted all of it to be over. However, I could only dream of that. The bell announced the end of the lesson, and like a torpedo, I started packing all my stuff. I just wanted to leave classroom without looking at anyone.

- Judith, right? - I heard the voice I know so well behind me. Not wanting to turn around and show my crying red eyes, I stood in the same place trying to ignore him. - I got your valentine. - There was a pause. I started packing up more slowly. I wondered which way it would go. I even hoped it would happen just like in the movies. It turns out that he felt same about me as much as I did. However, a small caution. Movies are just movies. Shit without any reflection in life. They have nothing to do with real life. If you thought that white pigeons would now jump out and you would see us in the church saying the famous "yes", you were wrong. - Listen, can you turn around for a moment? I don't want to talk to your back. - At his words, I turned to him, curling brown hair behind my ear. The chocolate curls were slightly disheveled and arranged on left side, the gray patterned shirt was unbuttoned at the top by about four buttons, showing a piece of his chest. Black jeans wrapped around his legs, and slightly damaged conversy adorned his legs. Between the squares with rings and signets there was a red heart - my card. Without even knowing it, I held my breath. Seeing no reaction on my part, he began to speak with a slight amusement. - I want to be fair, so I give you the card back and answer your confession. Although I think you can already guess what I think. - Tears began to appear once again in my eyes that day. He didn't even care how he hurt me with what he said. - Did you really think I could be with you? I mean, you know. Don't be angry, but you don't belong to the prettiest. - These words hit me the most. You don't belong to the prettiest? This is why you don't want to date a girl? Because she's not pretty or skinny like the others? Thinking that the laughter I heard was a tragedy, this was death. My mind was thinking that he was actually right. I'm gross. Maybe I should kill myself? I really thought he was right. His laughter brought me alive, which he tried to cover up with a cough. Not stopping my lip from trembling anymore, I looked back at him with glass eyes. I still saw him as the perfect boy, but in myself I stopped seeing good things. I was nothing. - You really thought. - He had a smirk on his lips, which I thought was wonderful and slightly sexy. He put the card on the bench next to us and looked into my eyes. - Listen, if it makes you feel better, I'll keep it as a secret. I will not tell anyone about your poetic declaration of love, but do not count on us being together. - He shrugged and grabbed the backpack laying next to the bench. I could not hold back my tears. I let them run down my cheeks like a river. I wasn't ashamed. Seeing my lack of response, he nodded and threw his backpack over his shoulder. - Guess that would be it ... bye. - He turned around, skipping my bench and left the classroom. After that I didn't even want to stop my crying. I sat in the chair, wiping the tears from my cheeks with trembling hands. As I said, I broke that day. Part of me was lost. Bradley's words were nothing. Three breaks later, the whole school knew about it, and I was mocked until the end of the school year. As a bonus, Brook told everyone about my mother's vibrator under my bed (which of course was not true). In short, I was fucked up. I spent the entire five months in despair and misery eating white chocolate while watching "Holiday". Pretty depressing picture. However, to show a slightly brighter side of this event. I understood something, or rather desired. I wanted revenge. I cried for so long, I wanted him to taste it too. I wanted his heart to be torn apart by wolves. I wanted him to know the taste of broken heart that I got in instead. I wanted to see despair in him. So I came up with a plan. And I gave myself the word that I would not rest until I realized it. I'll break his heart like he does to me. He will feel how few words will take away your motivation to live. He was supposed to be a wreck according to my plan. And I was supposed to fight for it.

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So here we go. My first English fanfiction. I never thought that one day i do it, but ... life can surprise us sometimes. For now it's only prolog, but on Friday I should post chapter 1. Write in comments what you already thinking about it and ... see you in next chapter 💔