peach ↠p.jm

01

[你為什麼不愛我]

it was raining today.

even though i do like sunny days, rain always calmed me down. i guess it's because i somehow understood the rain. if that makes sense.

maybe because when it was raining you'd come and cuddle with me. i miss those times. when you cared..

when me and you would just listen to the sound of the rain. we would also play games together. do you remember that? why can't we do that again?

where did it all go wrong?

one day you just completely ignored me. you got angry for no reason. i was once the most beautiful and most cared flower in the garden, and now i'm just wilting, waiting to be watered and cared for again.

did you meet someone new? are they better than me? was i not good enough?

i'm waiting for you to come back and cuddle with me like you'd promised. i guess i'm not your top priority anymore.

i gazed out the window again. i can hear and see the rain pouring harder. i cry. i feel worthless, helpless knowing you won't come. knowing you don't love me as you once did.

i cry more often. you don't even notice me anymore. i try to breakup with you, but i can't. i don't know why, you probably don't even love me anymore as much as i do. but it's okay, im okay with the pain.

it's funny how it's been raining a lot recently. it's like it knows when i'm sad. there's barely any sunny days anymore.

i've been waiting for at least 10 hours for you to come back. maybe longer, who knows. you won't come will you? you're probably drunk with your friends and at clubs right now.

should i move on? should i find someone new, and forget you? maybe you're treating me like this because i've done something bad to you and i didn't even realize it. i wish i could forget you but i just can't. i still love you.

i fell for you. i guess you didn't. at least not like i did for you. i wish i didn't fall in love with you, but i don't regret our relationship. because i know even though we are both broken, we did have wonderful times.

do you remember when we went to our first date? we went to the beach and did star gazing while hearing the shores. putting our feet in the sand. it felt so nice. so peaceful,

i loved it. we shared our secrets, stories, and our futures to each other. i was so open to you. you were as well. i remember thinking you were perfect. the way you smiled, when you're embarrassed you'd just laugh or hit the person next to you. everything

i really do love everything about you. there's not any part of me that's good or perfect compared to you. i'm nothing compared to you. you were the king while i was the peasant.

i look at the clock. '11:32pm.' you left at early in the morning. you really do seem more distant. you look at me as if i'm not even there anymore...

do you hate me that much..

why can't you just love me back,
park jimin?