make me stay.

two

♜

the sun had been barely hanging above the horizon, just high enough to brush a few pale sun stripes over my face when low voices entered my mind. the sudden heat along with light wakes me slowly, as i grunt, taking in a tired breath. 

a sensation of having melted into my mattress washes over me, as i wiggle my toes, planning on getting up. letting my heavy head fall back into the pillow beneath, i blink, letting the ceiling come into focus as the voices catch my ear again.

"what if anything happens? we won't be there," 

"something will happen, elijah, and we aren't supposed to be there." my mother had replied, her tone firm and decisive. she had seemed worried yesterday, but i knew she trusted me in making the right decisions. this hadn't been an overnight thought. 

"she has never been further away from home than day-trips to the south markets. don't you think she feels compelled to make something out of her childhood before everything changes?" my father called back. "the higher kingdom is dangerous, and i sincerely doubt the maturity of her friends. they'll end up crossing a law, caring for the consequences too late."

"do you remember when he left?" 

and suddenly, the conversation changes into one i wished i could mute. 

"mercer wilson. those grandparents never had it easy controlling that boy," my father spoke, carefully filtering his words. "wherever he ended up, it surely did that couple good." 

mercer wilson had grown up a finger's length from our house, living with his grandparents. he had never told me anything about his parents, but i had quickly assumed they were both passed. just like my father had said; it hadn't exactly seemed like his grandparents had had much choice with taking him in. he had never made it easy on them, almost as if did he blame them for him ending up here. 

he had begun noticing me when we were around ten, the last time i saw him barely days before i turned sixteen. 

he had come over, brought a tiny gift with him. an early birthday gift, apparently. i hadn't known then, but that was the last i ever saw of him. 

he had left, and seemed happy to. 

"it seemed to do everyone good that he left. except for her." my mother's voice had been barely above a whisper at the last words, like had someone put a lid over her head half-way through. "he broke her heart, and she never recovered." 

"sometimes, you learn the hard way, maura. maire knew from the beginning of their relationship that it wasn't right; loving anyone besides your mate. waiting for them is the right thing to do, and we should've told her that. soon, she'll get her mark and find her soulmate. it would be our job to keep her alive until that happens, and sending her to the mountain would be the worst idea i've heard all year." 

my father had always had this harsh tone, genuinely being a very serious person. he never told much about his life before us, but i knew enough to understand why he took the rules so seriously. he had lived a poor childhood, and after getting his mark, his life had suddenly gotten meaning. he had met the love of his life, found good work and started a family. 

"he's right, mother." i had intentionally moved downstairs without making a sound. they both turned their heads, spotting me in the doorway of the kitchen. "i knew the rules. falling in love before you turn eighteen is useless since it'll change after then, anyways. but i've suffered the consequences, and i still wouldn't go back and change my decisions if i could."