Chasing Blind

Chapter 1

  There was a time in my life, where I wondered. How could I possibly make such a blank canvas of papers be filled with colorful bliss of emotions and words?

With the neverending valley of surprises and ideas a person can make with its mind, the mixed emotions you feel as you read a book, flipping from a page to another, the scent of a book, and how the story unfolds itself to a complete case of art.

I wondered, easily being drifted by waves of ideas and colors my mind could have spilled. Everything was so clear. As clear as a brilliant diamond, shining proudly through its beautiful state. It gave me a wonderous feeling- an exquisite beauty that gradually earned a smile to my face by just thinking about how can I possibly write something this beautiful and vivid. Never did I thought my dreams could become so much better as the time progresses by. Being kept hidden in my own little wonderous mind where I kept my ideas and sweet dreams deeply praised and known only and truly by myself.

I always knew that there will be a time that I needed to set and share all of this beauty free for everyone to see and praise as well. But it terrifies me to have them bash it rather than praising such an exquisite piece.

These silly thoughts of mine had never once decided to leave me, whilst enjoying the bubbly joy of myself secretly make more and more scenarios in my head. Tinkering day and night, this silly and playful ideas of mine slowly became a decision for me to take. A decision a simple child-like I was before would never truly understand and never did so.

And it all started, one faithful yet disastrous day in highschool. Making my mind get completely glued to the idea- of dropping out of college to make this silly idea of mine into a decision I could never regret.

Well..more or less. Something I could never take back.

How about we take this story from the very beginning? Not so long ago after my parents married each other, my mother was diagnosed as pregnant. Happily expecting its first child, they did and gave away the best efforts they can pull off to their upcoming child. And so, I was born out of my mother's womb- healthy and normal. Given by the name of Ivery Aisha Reed, I was my parent's ray of sunshine- and neverending ear raping torture of having myself as a complete brat that practically likes to scream as mighty as an eagle back on my old days.

But nonetheless, there was always a way for a young old me to stop screeching like an eagle.

"AAAAHHHH!!!!!"  The young and handful little old me screeches without shame in such sleepy night, disturbing the neighbors and embarrassing my parents with their hands shoved in their ears as if its lives depend on it. Distressed once again.

I used to throw tantrums at certain hours of the day. And it always happens whenever my parents are forgetting to do something important in their daily routine before setting me to bed. And as a kid, that had always made me feel easily agitated and unsettled by little things they tend to forget. As if a whale decided to take a big splash on my face before taking its final leave without any bother to apologize nor worry. I didn't like that feeling at all, so I ended up finding myself having the habit to cause a ruckus to cast their final attention unto me before they leave me.

"Oh Ivy honey.." my mother, Eva, cooed me as she carried me in her warm arms. Cradling the young and handful old me into her where I know its safe.

"Momma! You almost forgot it!" I cried out loud,  cradling me in her arms around as we both wobbled whilst my mother tried to balanced herself to avoid getting a fall.

"You almost forgot it!" I repeated and repeated and repeated until she could finally understand my sudden outburst.

My mother sighed, cradling me once again as she hummed, "I'm very sorry, Ivy. You see momma-"