The green coat of luck

Chapter XVI, "Heather"

My oh my how broken cycles can cause figments to enter one's dream. A place where they escape to seek leisure elsewhere than this pathetic life. Where one's eyes stop shouting pictures at our mind, where our brain liquid gets replaced and renewed.

Yet what walks through my fantasies and escapism, is the woman of my nightmares. The woman that stands in between the gate of heaven and earth refusing to let me enter the new-found paradise of mine. She still shows up whenever I decide to wander off into my wildest dreams. She still manages to find her place as the maleficent in the tale of sleeping beauty.

The dark shadow which replaces my every idea and thought with darkness, with complete hollowness, and emptiness. A nightmare she has become, and one I cannot awaken from.

I can't do one more night screaming at the top of my lungs, begging for mercy by an invisible God, which couldn't give less of a fuck about a piece of shit like me. Dear God, if you exist why have you condemned me?

Bella's eyes seem greyer for every passing day, her face seems hollow and she barely speaks or eats anything that is served. It is still a miracle to both of us how we managed to get this room.

Throwback to the meeting of Mr. Gwenesphere

As the nice lady who remains behind the name of Mrs. Gwenesphere with the bags and eyes full of mysteries and adventures dropped us off. We had to run as our life depended on it toward the loading dock. If I hadn't taken Bella's hand and ran like there was a hellfire chasing us we wouldn't have gotten the chance to walk on the entering gate.

As we jumped over the edge and into the gate while it was closing off and bidding its goodbye heading toward Poland We ended up face down, chin up, our eyes landing on some dark and muddy worker shoes. The Poles. Now we have to explain to these men who barely speak Italian, let alone English to let us see the manger of this ship.

One of them did not care and was about to grab us by the collar and throw us out of off the ship as if we were the food wrappers from his food that littered the boat and should be thrown out. Bella fainted once one Pole laid his hand on her upper chest causing her to fall on top of this man.

The tall, bald 6'5 man felt suddenly a sense of remorse and decided to take this girl in and not let her freeze and get hyperthermia under this rainy sky and even greyer night.

I am stills shocked by how life is working in our favor? It seems as so it can have its ups and downs, but these men were about to beat us up and throw us off of the cruise, not caring if we were humans! They were treating us like we were nothing!

I would assume they were scared of getting caught because if they got caught they would lose their job. I don't blame them for worrying but to pull me by the collar and leaning half my body on the cruise rail as if I wasn't a person and only a piece of meat that can be thrown out gave me a deeper perspective on how this life and society truly is. Quite fucked up.

What a world, what a place, what a situation to which we have ended up in. Just a week from today I was getting pounded by some old lady with lustful urges I had to deal with. Supposedly as a part of some sick test set-up, to observe my ability to live through this wondrous life we live through.

Back to the present

It mind boggles me how I was able to squeeze myself into this small parallelogram fitted bathroom where I could do number two, shower, and flood the bathroom all at once!

Due to the small so-called drain which also looks like a hole in the wall for mice to walk through! Not to mention the showerhead, which was as long as my pinky and dripped little to no water! Accompanied by the smelly body, hair, and face wash which supposedly smelt like Jasmine, but to me, however, it smelled like actual horseshit. I would know I used to rake it every morning.