RUE

A Good Listener

All hell broke loose! He gripped his stabbed leg, dabbing the area where blood was oozing out, wailing at the top of his lungs. I stood there panting hard, the dagger still suspended in air, covered with his blood. The blood was flowing from the dagger to my hand to the sleeves of my dress but I didn't care. My head was still heavy from the high and I could not believe my own deed. What have I done!

Instantly, I noticed a crowd gathering around me, horror and shock evident from each of their faces. Two guys, the jerk's friends I guess, ran towards him, one dabbing his wound, the other making him lay down on the ground. Suddenly, all the family members were there, Chris and Dad running towards my victim, striking horror on their face.

"Di.." I felt a hand on my air suspended arm and I jerked towards the speaker, my hand lowering finally. Alisha was looking at me, all clad in her bridal wear, her face fear struck, but the difference was that the fear was for me and not from me.

"Are you okay?"

"Alisha!" my mother's voice rang loudly, inspite of the multiple chattering and I saw her dashing towards us with an angry face. "Get away from her!" she jerked away Alisha's hold from me and pushed her away from me, hiding her behind her back. "She has got blood in her hands" she spat disgustingly. The meaning of her words was like a dagger in my heart.

I saw Raghav running towards his injured friend with two men in tow, holding a stretcher. They lifted him onto it and ran towards the exit, the two friends trailing behind. As soon as they left, Chris turned towards me with an icy expression.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he literally shouted the words. Everyone else were quiet now eager to witness the show that seemed about to happen. "Are you insane?" he spat the words on my face.

"Chris.." my father chastised him trying to retain the image for the sake of his daughter's in-laws, but my brother was unstoppable.

"No Dad! Enough is enough" he retorted. "Since last two years, this girl has been playing with our family's sentiments" he held my upper arm tightly to the point of hurting. "Tell me! Tell me why! You do it on purpose. Don't you?"

"You..are a selfish bitch. You don't care if mom cries every time you go to rehab, you don't care that Alisha is fighting everyone just to keep you in this wedding, you don't care if Dad is risking his reputation in letting a drug addict at his daughter's wedding. You. Just. Don't. Care," he jerked my hand and I lost my balance falling on the ground on all fours.

Suddenly, I realise something changing in me. I lifted my blood-clad hands to my face, to feel wetness under my eyes. Am I crying! I feel small sobs forming at the base of my throat and tears leaking down my face to my chin onto my lap. Chris, however, did not seem to notice the flip of my emotional switch.

"Now you are happy, right? You have officially ruined my sister's wedding" he was pacing back and forth, his hands tugging his hair. "One thing, I asked you one thing, but you..."

My shoulders started shaking and now I was wailing loudly, both my hands affixed at the ground. My hair was a mess and I could imagine how my eyes would be looking. But I didn't care. All the things, I knew my family thought about me but never said, were out in the light today. It brought all the ghosts of my life in front of my eyes. My little brother hated me so much. No one wanted me here, yet I...Why do I forget that I don't deserve all these..family love, friendship, laughter...I just don't!

I was filled with self abhorrence, when I felt firm hands holding me from behind. I turn abruptly, shocked from the fact that someone is here to console me, and I find Rajat looming over me. He has settled himself on the ground too, to match my level, his firm arms holding me soothingly, his concerned eyes looking down at me. And may be it was because of the ruthlessness of my family towards me or due to our growing equation since the last few days, I turned towards him completely and hugged him tightly around his torso. He adjusts himself so that I am completely enveloped by his body, my head fitting under his chin, my sobs getting muffled in his jacket. I let myself relax at his proximity and wail even louder, disgusted at me and my situation. I don't deserve this!