Flickers (Charles Xavier)

Chapter 24

The lessons of the day had drawn to a close, and most of the students were either eating dinner or already making their way to their rooms. Iris was on her way to her study to pick up some things and finish working for the night.

"Miss. Miracle?"

She spun around quickly. The corridor was empty, apart from Jean Grey standing opposite her with an unreadable expression.

"What is it, Jean?" Iris asked gently, surprised by the sight of the young student.

"Can we... can I talk to you about something? Please? In private?" Jean asked hesitantly, her voice quiet.

"Of course," Iris smiled, "Come with me to my study, we can talk there."

Jean followed Iris up the stairs in silence, and as the two sat down in Iris' study, the moonlight gave the room an eerie atmosphere.

"What's the matter?" Iris leant forwards, and Jean sighed.

"It's... I- I feel like I'm losing control of my power. Both you and the Professor have really been helping me with focusing it so that I'm not hearing voices from everywhere all the time and my telekinesis has become stronger. But... I can't shake the feeling that there's something darker within me, just like what I told the Professor when he first found me. It's like something else within me wants to control my abilities and... not for good."

Iris inhaled deeply, studying Jean's worried expression and realising how similar Jean Grey was to a younger version of herself. She shivered.

"Jean... I understand how you feel-"

"No you don't!" Jean snapped suddenly, "To lose control of your power, it's terrifying. I have no idea what I could do to someone."

Iris closed her eyes and steadied her breathing for a moment before reaching forwards and taking Jean's hand.

"I do know how it feels Jean. When I was... when I was a child I was weaponised by a man who wanted to use me only for his own benefit. Because of him, my parents died. My memories of my mutation and my power itself was blocked, and I had no idea what I was capable of until the Professor came looking for me to recruit. He unlocked my power and reminded me of what I could do. But Jean, to this day, I still don't understand the full extent of my own abilities. There are still things that I do now that surprise and terrify me at the same time. Ten years ago, I was extremely close to losing control, and I almost did something despicable to someone who I had once considered a friend. It took a gunshot to my leg to snap me out of it."

Jean appeared to be lost for words, so Iris continued.

"I am scared of what I'm capable of. Even after all of the training that the Professor has put me through I still feel terrified, knowing that I could hurt the people that I love some day. If someone were to unlock that weapon within me, that would be all it takes for me to lose control."

Iris finished, and the room fell silent. She shifted uncomfortably, aware she had never revealed so much about herself to a student.

"I..." Jean gulped, "I had no idea. I'm sorry. Do you feel in more control than you used to?"

Iris hesitated, "It comes and goes, but I'm generally more in control than I was. The Professor has helped me with it, and I'm sure he can help you too. The both of us can."

Jean's face was difficult to read, but she nodded, "Thank you for telling me that. I appreciate it. It's good to know I'm not alone."

"You're never alone, Jean," Iris whispered softly, and Jean smiled gratefully. After a moment of silence, Jean stood up and thanked Iris quietly, "Goodnight."