Chapter XVII

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FIRST LOVE. FIRST KISS. First night spent away from home. Things that leave their mark oneveryone. These were true enough for me, but there was also the time I almost drowned, the first time I rode a horse, and now there was the day I sat in front of my kidnapper and realized that everything in my once-happy life was all just an illusion. Congrats, girl, you’re a half-breed, an Immortal, the love child of angelic aliens and ancient hut-dwellers. Oh, really? Wow, sweet…

I didn’t remember standing up, or even the long walk down the twisting stone steps. All I could feel was the wet grass on my bare feet as I walked through the meadow.

I felt like I was in a fog, that what I had thought was real turned out to be just a curtain. Now the curtain had lifted, and what was lying in wait behind jumped out and ravaged my mind. I can’t really believe this lunatic murderer and kidnapper, can I? I had no way of knowing if what he had told me was true. But, wait… I shivered. His last words echoed through my brain threateningly.

I was beginning to understand the meaning of risk—because I was starting to doubt everything I thought I knew.

The end of our conversation played in the large space of my freshly expanded mind:

“How did you know that the story I wanted to read to you was in Genesis chapter six?” he’d said.

I stared at him in utter amazement. “It was a lucky guess,” I said flatly.

“Was it?” He raised one eyebrow, a small smile lifting the right side of his mouth. “I was thinking of the book and chapter in my mind. You read my thoughts, Airel. I suspected you might have that gift, among others …”

“Who are you?” I shouted at him, my voice cracking. It’s funny, but I didn’t let him answer me—or if he had, I couldn’t remember what it was. I had stormed off the porch, letting my feet carry me where they would.

I ended up sitting in the wet grass in the meadow, glances of which I had stolen so often from my room. I was a candle burnt from both ends, completely spent. My eyes filled with tears as I felt the dark woods surrounding me. Superhuman? But I was just an average girl … invisible.

But not now. And never again. Now that I had been jolted awake, all I wanted was to be able to go back to sleep. The real world was simply too terrible. I just wanted to go back to being invisible, or at least being able to believe I was. Now the things I wanted the most were out of reach. Permanently.

And they were foolish, too.

I became overwhelmed with one thought, and words failed to describe even near to what I felt, because it soaked into the marrow of my bones in that moment. What I felt, stronger than anything I had ever felt, what faded literally every other concern into the background, including my family, my future, and Michael, was that I had woken up today to find that I was indeed different. Superhuman. In the aftermath of this revelation, all I felt, though, was frail. My mind was firmly trapped in the difference between the two.

Shoulders shaking, shivering with chills, I sobbed and cried forever. I didn’t care what Michael or that horrible man thought. What did it matter, anyway? What did I have to look forward to? Days, months, years, decades, centuries, lifetimes of loneliness—if what he had implied about immortality was true—and knowing that I was not just different, but different in a way no one would ever understand.

Feeling like, at seventeen years of age, I had cried enough tears for many lifetimes already, the ripples in the little pond of my life began finally to subside. At least now I knew for certain. I didn’t know how long—how many years—it might take for me to come to grips with it. In the end, a weight had been lifted from my shoulders, though, and I needed that desperately. The Question had been replaced with Truth. A different kind of burden altogether.

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