I'm Not Insane. Just Not Insane

How To Love

That awkward moment when you write 5 depressingish poems in school, hoping no one is reading them over your shoulder because then they'll judge. xD Yeah.. well.. merp.. heres your chapta fool!

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Chapter 10- How To Love

Ella’s P.O.V.

Why am I here?  What am I doing?  Words were running through my mind.  Kate opened my door, and hung to my door.

“Hey, I’m going to the hospital, do you wanna come?”  Kate slurred her words, but I understood.

“Sure, I guess,” I hopped up, and threw a sweatshirt on, “lemme just get a water.”  I ran down the stairs, while hearing Kate stumble down. “Do you want me to drive?”

She looked at me for a moment, “Yes.”  I grabbed the keys, and walked outside, popping some aspirin in my mouth.

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We wreak of drugs and alcohol.  I walked towards the hospital door, scrunching up my nose.  Kate tried her best to look as sober as possible.  Which, didn’t work out to well.  Whatever.  We went up to the desk, and asked for my dad’s and Xavier’s room.

“Well, Xavier is in room 204, and Drew is in 210,” The lady said slowly, probably noticing the smell.

I smiled, and nodded, “Thanks.”  I looked at Kate, and started heading to Xavier’s room.  “Why don’t you go to,” I stared at her and spat out the words, “dad’s room?”

Kate stared at me, comprehending what I was saying, “Alright.”

We walked in silence, until we had to go into the rooms. “Good luck,” I mumbled, and headed into Xavier’s room.

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The worst idea ever.  The doctor talked to me about Xavier, and how he was doing.  It was terrible.  Poor Xavier has a broken arm, shattered foot, and fractured ribs.  He also has 17 stitches on his other arm.  But, at least he’s alright.  My dad, on the other hand, I have no idea.  He’s in a coma, I don’t know what’s going to happen.

We sat there in the car, no one talking, no music playing.  Nothing.  Kate was in pain, she didn’t know what to do.  She was freaking out.  Me, on the other hand, just sat there, looking at my phone.  Someone text me, someone text me, someone text me.  Those words went through my mind, knowing no one will.  We drove home in silence, Kate sighing a few times.  I really didn’t know what to do anymore, I was thinking about going over to Zack’s, but I didn’t know if I should or not.   I’M NOT INSANE, I’M NOT INSANE.  My phone rang, which scared the shit out of me.  It was Bryan.  “Hey dude, wanna chill?” I smiled at his text.  I replied a simple ‘yes’, and waited until we were home.

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“Kate!” I yelled, rubbing my hair with a towel, “Imma go and chill with some friends, alright?” 

Her voice was soft, “Yeah it’s okay, some money is gonna be on the counter for you.”  She sounded drunk. 

I sighed, and blew my hair dry.  Finishing up my makeup, I heard a knock at the door.  It was infact, Bryan standing there, awkwardly.  I ran inside, and grabbed the money on the counter, and left.

Bryan’s P.O.V.

She looked really pretty.  What was I thinking.  I must be high.  I sighed, and headed to my car with Ella.  She did look pretty though.  We buckled up, and headed off.

“Where are we goin?” Ella’s voice made my hands feel tingly.

“Oh well,” I looked at the wheel, “We are gonna get some blueberry kush from a friend.”  She nodded, and bobbed her head at the music.

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“Thanks bro,” I walked back to the car, with 3 grams in the bag. “Yumm.”

Ella looked up and smiled, “Yess!” She laughed. “Is it just gonna be us?”

I smiled, “Yeah, wanna go to my crib?” I started backing out, “No one’s home.”

She nodded, “Sure.”

The car ride was kinda quiet.  Nothing really to talk about, but that’s okay.  I missed hanging out with Ella.

“You ready to get fucked up?” I laughed, holding a lighter in my hand.

“You know it!” She laughed.

We were smoking the shit out of the blunt.  One hit, two hit, three hit, four, and pass.  Ella was already getting fucked up, which was funny.  We were talking about the most randomest shit ever.  That was until Ella brought up an awkward subject.

“How do you know when you’re in love?” She was referring the question to me.

I stared at her blankly for a minute, “Well, when I know the person real well, when all I think about is them.  And all that other shit.”

She stared at me for a minute.  Her lips looked so yummy.  “Well, I think I’m in love,” She whispered.

I looked at her for a minute, “Who would that be?”

She smiled, “Teach me how to love first,” laughing, “Then I’ll tell you.”

That sold me.

Matt’s P.O.V.

Where the hell is she?  I was getting worried.  Her mom- I’m assuming- said that Ella isn’t home.  Where would she be?  At the hospital?  Naw, I don’t think she could handle the pain.  Then it clicked, she’s probably with Bryan.  I called Bryan’s cell, he answered, but didn’t say anything.

“Well, I think I’m in love,” A girl’s voice said.

“Who would that be?” Sounded like Bryan.

“Teach me how to love first, then I’ll tell you.”

I hung up the phone, as fast as I could.  That couldn’t be Ella.  She wouldn’t do that.  No, she wouldn’t.  It probably is Ella dumbass, she does drugs.  The facts look at the facts!  My mind was yelling at me. 

“Shut up!” I yelled, punching the desk in my room.  I needed to calm down.

I’m just saying.  Look at her, she’s a complete reck.  Why bother trying to help her, she’ll mess it up anyway.

“No, no, no, no!” I looked at the ground trying to concentrate. “Stop it!”

Look at the facts, Matt, look at them.  Look what happened to Xavier, why do you think she’s doing it.  Her dad hates her.  She takes all the blows for Xavier, but this one.  She feel’s like its her fault.  And only her fault.

I was done with the voice in my head, “Stop it, stop it, stop it.  Imma shoot myself!  Stop talking!” I yelled, and punched the wall, “Stop it!”

I think I’m in love.

 “Stop it!” I punched the wall one more time.

Teach me how to love.  That just broke me.  I remember standing by the wall, and throwing my head towards the wall.  Teach me how to love.  Teach me how to love.

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HOW TO LOVE.  JUST TEACH ME HOW TO LOVE.  AHAH! Well, I hope you guys like this one... :3

~Vixz~