My Omega ~ Drarry

Chapter 12: Sorry Apologies

Draco's 1st POV

Just as the train came to a lurch, I suddenly had the urge to throw up. I guess, maybe, I should have told my friends about the omega thing. That way I could have saved my energy, and simply used the spell around the others.

That way I could be spared from their judgemental glares.

It made me feel sick. The thought that someone else could have been going through what I was, and I made fun of them. I am a monster. And it made my stomach churn.

What have I turned into?

I clutch my waist tightly, wrapping both arms around my now-fragile body, waiting for the sobs to stop. Merlin. If I was feeling this bad already, how would I cope for the entire year?

My head still hurts, and my nap has made me feel a little better. Maybe it was a one-off. Maybe it was just because I hadn't gotten any sleep last night, and it was the insomnia sapping my energy. It would make sense.

But I know I cannot hide forever.

When I get back, most people have gone. Most people have already boarded the carriages, and are making their way to Hogwarts.

Okay, I can do this. No-one else is around, so I breathe deeply, inhaling the fresh scent that can always be found around Hogwarts. My legs tremble, and my knees are weak.

I almost trip and fall, but I catch myself and hoist my aching body into a carriage. I am one of the last to get down the train, so I get a carriage to myself. Leaning my head against the walls of the carriage, I keep breathing deeply. 

Don't think. Don't think about it.

It was as if the world had started spinning like a top. My eyes watered at the wave of dizziness I'm hit with. As if my life wasn't hard enough already.

It's okay. It's all okay.

I arch my back, trying to get air. It's like I am being suffocated. I've always hated the feeling; it makes me think of when my father, or even Lord Voldermort, used dark alpha magic.

It's so, so terrifying.

My entire life, I've been surrounded by alphas, who often use their magic for evil or bad things. My mother is an alpha, forced into an arranged marriage with my father. She didn't necessarily use her dark magic on me, but she hasn't exactly really supported me.

No-one loves me. No-one could ever love me.

I can't do this. I can't think of what my life could be. I need to focus. I need to do what the Dark Lord has asked me. I need to save my friends and 'family'.

I'm sorry.

I don't want to do this. I can't. But I need to. I'd give anything for Pansy, Blaise, Vince, Greg and Theo to be safe.

I'm so sorry. 

A/N I'm really sorry, guys! I completely forgot about last week's competition, so I will try to post an extra chapter on Sunday, for all the votes and comments I have gotten! Love y'all, see you on Thursday!