L'appel du vide [frerard]

Chapter 12- The blood in my veins

"Gerard..." I started. Grabbing hold of his hand and looking at him with the sweetest eyes I could have possibly pulled off. He looked at me, he knew I wanted something. Which was true. I did want something. I wanted to be closer to him. To really BE with him.

I didn't know how I was going to propose the idea though. What if he laughed at me? What if he thought I was crazy and flip out on me again like last time. I couldn't let something like that happen again. I rubbed my forefinger up and down his palm and reached forward up his arm.

Gerard looked down at my action, "I...uh," he paused. I placed my other hand on his thigh and started to rub up and down. "What-what are you doing?" He asked. I smirked at him this time. I could tell he wanted this too. I didn't have to say anything and he already knew. It was time for this.

I leaned forward and gave him a light peck on the lips, then traveled down to his cheek, to his chin, and the finally down to his jawline. I stopped and looked up at him. He was breathing heavily. I placed a soft kiss right on the peak of his ear. He moaned softly. I smirked against his skin.

Oh yeah he wanted this. He grabbed hold of my face and kissed me passionetly telling me it was okay. I smiled and held his hand with my empty one. I made my way down to his torso and placed my hands under his shirt rubbing up and down. His skin was soft. He was thin too, which was something I wasn't. He sighed the minute my warm hands touched his cold body.  He pulled away from me,

"I like that." He whispered. 

"hm?" 

"I like how your hands feel on me. How they're so warm compared to me." He looked down and smiled, "It almost reminds me of what it's like to have a pulse." 

"How so?" 

"The blood running through your veins. I can feel it against my chest. And I like that you can do that." 

I leaned my head on his shoulder and breathed heavily. I don't think i've ever felt so content with having blood run through my body and keeping me alive everyday. 

"I love you." I whispered, my eyes getting slightly teary. God, I hated that I had gotten so attached. I looked up at him, he seemed to be wearing the same expression I was. He smiled at me, "I know." was all he said. 

He didn't have to say the words. I knew he loved me. Because it's not how someone says that they love you, it's how they show it that counts. And I could really tell I had opened up some sort of sweet spot in Gerard, just as he had done to me. It felt nice. Not being alone, having someone who loves you. 

That night we slept together. No, not sex. But we just slept. But this time it was different then when he's slept in my bed. We were somehow closer. We both knew what we wanted. We were clear of that. And honestly, I don't think anything else would have made us both happier. 

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