My Life As A Calder

Chapter 10

Today I got to take Buddy home. I drove to get him and happy to see him starting to hobble around. He got into the car and I drove home. Bruno was happy to see him but I had to take Buddy into the dog room to rest. I couldn't let Bruno jump on him and rip open his stitches.

I spent most of the day lazing around doing nothing. I let buddy rest in the room and snow pranced around the house in a pink and grey vest. I did absolutely nothing but spend the day on Facebook and talking to Harry. I looked at interior ideas to change or fix up my house, mainly focusing on the kitchen. My kitchen was already modern and new but I got sick of it. I wanted a change and decided I was going to get it renovated and redone. I looked though various designs before adding it to my to-do list for 2015.

The next day wasn't very eventful either. I decided to dye my hair though so I dyed it blonde...

A couple of days later, I was at home getting ready for a day at the beach with the girls. Rachael had organised a day at the beach with Sarah, herself and I. I packed a towel and sunscreen. I wore a pink beach dress over my green bikini and wore my brown beach hat and ray bans. I drove to Torquay, picking both of them up on the way in my car.

We got there and laid our towels out and started to sun bathe. I loved the feeling of the warm sun on my skin. I needed to get a tan as I was starting to turn pale again. I didn't let my baby bump bother me. It was a way of letting people know I wasn't single or in the mood for a relationship with anyone else.

At midday, Sarah and Rach went to go get everyone some lunch, leaving me alone. I went onto my phone and went onto Facebook. I snapped a few beach selfies and spoke to a few people before the hate I read started to get to me. Since harry and I started officially dating, everyone had sent me hate telling me to 'Kill myself' and to 'Go die and rot in hell'. I couldn't handle it anymore. I had been getting a heap lately and it was stressing me out too much. I decided I needed to speak to Haz, opting to call him.

He answered on the 5th ring, greeting me in his husky voice I loved. Hearing it made me burst into tears and he sounded concerned trying to hush me. I knew I had to do it so I just said it.
'I think we need a break. It's too hard and stressful for me and our baby'.
He went silent for a while before speaking with a shaky voice. I remember him asking why and begging for us to stay together but I knew I couldn't. I wasn't strong enough. I could hear him sobbing and sniffing which broke my heart. I hated hurting him but it was the only way.
'But I love you.'

Those words stuck in my mind the rest of the day. I had to keep a strong facade. I had said goodbye to harry and agreed to stay friends and keep in contact. He hung up after not being able to keep talking. It broke my heart but it was for the best. He could go live his career and life and I would live mine. We were still friends and will still each other but we weren't together. It went back to me working for him, for the boys.

Rach and Sarah had bought me a meat pie which I ate. I didn't tell them about harry. I decided not to, at least not yet. Before we left, I took a photo of them together. I didn't want to be in it due to my belly. I wasn't embarrassed, it just felt awkward. I dropped them off at their place and headed home.

I was bored at home so I booked Jess and I's flight to New York. It departed at 8am on the 28th of December. I also booked accommodation at Four Seasons hotel near Central Park. I decided to spoil Jess since she had never been to NY and booked a fancy suit that wasn't too expensive. I wasn't going to pay $48,000 a night!

It was around 3pm when I got a text from Sarah saying that her, Rachael, Brydie and Jess were going out for dinner and asked if I wanted to come. I agreed and started to get ready. I changed into a pair of short black denim jeans and tucked a white, loose lacy white top into them. I also wore a pair of black velvet high heels and made my hair wavy and applied makeup. I left and drove there.

We had dinner on the waterfront in St. Kilda. I ordered the Caesar salad and enjoyed it. When we were ready to go, Jess came back with me deciding to sleepover at mine. Just to put into perspective on what Jess looks like, she had long dark brown hair and gorgeous brown eyes. She's average height and a gorgeous build. Don't be fooled, she isn't Jesy Nelson haha.

At my place, we watched movies in the theatre at the back of my house. I had set up the popcorn machine like in the cinemas so we had an unlimited amount of popcorn and I had the soft drink taps switched on. We gave up on soft drink and Jess bought out a bottle of vodka from the bar. We had an American Pie marathon and enjoyed it.

Around midnight, I decided I needed to go to bed as I felt a bit tipsy. I know, I know. I shouldn't be drinking because of the baby but I felt like I deserved it to forget about my worries. At least I didn't have a few smokes too. Jess was also tired and drunk and I let her choose where she slept. She didn't know wether to sleep in one of the guest rooms or in my bed with me. She ended up sleeping with me as she didn't want to disturb any of the perfect beds. She borrowed one of my oversize singlets and climbed into bed with me.

We chatted for a while in bed, and we shared all our thoughts. I vaguely remember telling her that I liked her more than a friend and she agreed. Thinking back to it, I don't know where that came from but it seemed right. I remember kissing her passionately, leading to a hot make out session. I don't remember how far we went but I knew I enjoyed it. I fell asleep hugging Jess and feeling like I had found the one.