Trust Me, I Know (Universe 3,608,661)

Chapter 28

Carol's POV

"Oh boy... we are so screwed." Carol groaned, raking her hands through her now long hair. She couldn't believe how her life liked to suck just as it was getting better.

"Can't you just use your fire magic?" Loki didn't look concerned, like, at all. Then again, he was Loki.

"Injury equals no binary."

"Oh. Better get my knives then."

Carol quickly limped out of the room. Sure she couldn't go binary, but heaven help anyone who tried to attack her when she was holding a stick.

"Why did they choose to appear when Carol's at her weakest?" Pyre asked Vers lazily.

"Character development."

"Sounds about right. Cue the flashbacks!"

Carol shook her head. Sometimes she highly doubted Vers and Pyre's sanity. In fact, she wasn't even sure if they had any sanity to begin with.

"Offended." Pyre snorted.

Yeah... Probably not...

PEW PEW PEW  PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW-

The Milano rolled to the side, effectively throwing Carol into the wall. The sooner she got rid of those crutches the better. They were so irritating...

Spinning back around, Carol slid down the wall, crying out when her damaged leg hit the floor, collapsing from her own weight.

"Zituas!" She swore, examining the wound, which was cracked and flecked with spots of blue blood.

"Language!" Vers mock gaped.

"Who the hell are you? Captain America?" Carol snapped back. Sarcasm was not what she needed right now. What she needed right now was not to die. Preferably not before she discovered what a 'meme' was.

Snatching up her crutch, she continued her way to the cockpit, not surprised to find Rocket and Quill bickering in their seats like seven year olds. 

"Let me fly!"

"No, I'll do it!"

"Come on, I can fly way better than you!"

"No chance star crap!"

"Shut up you overgrown trash panda!"

Carol rolled her eyes. "You know what, since the both of you are incapable of deciding, I'll fly the Milano, and you two will attempt to stop arguing. Deal?"

"But-"

"Excellent." Carol smiled sweetly at the two of them, portraying the 'you will get your ass kicked if you don't listen to me' look.

Grabbing the controls of the spacecraft, she was surprised to find how similar the controls were to those of a Kree Starship. Well, Ravangers did steal everything they saw, including ideas.

But they had made it super easy for her to fly it. How thoughtful of them.

Dodging the stream of lasers, Carol steered the Milano vertically, effortlessly guiding the ship through an asteroid field the size of Hala... in other words... a really, really, really big planet.

The Starships behind them were having way more trouble navigating through the narrow gaps, despite being much smaller and thinner. Carol felt a surge of adrenaline that she always got when flying planes or spacecraft. All they needed now was some music...

"Oh yes, we can't have dogfights without music. Can't believe it never occurred to you. What do you think this was, a funeral?" Pyre grinned.

Helpfulness: 0%.

"Carol, can't you go slower?" Quill groaned as he banged his head rest for the seventh time.

"What, you want to die?"

"Point taken, but at this speed, we're gonna die anyways."

"Pfft. Keep complaining and I'm going to force you to go in my light skipper and go full light speed."

"Light speed?"

"Shut up, you're distracting me." Carol narrowly dodged an asteroid.

"Why do you even have a spacecraft anyway, let alone a light skipper?" Rocket inquired.

"In case I get injured. Duh."

"Oh. Makes sense."

"Well, since both of you are being 'helpful', can you tell me where the nearest jump point is?"

"Uhhh... let me check." Quill started to look at various screens.

"Never mind, I remember where it is now." Carol waved them away. She just happened to be a frequent flyer through this area of space.

"You remember where the nearest jump point is? How big is your memory?" Rocket gaped at her.

"Large enough to remember multiple names in Kree for distracting, irritating men. Or raccoons."

"I AM NOT-"

"Shut. Up. Before I crash this thing on purpose."

Rocket closed his mouth, which Carol was extremely grateful for. Raccoons apparently needed a few lessons on being quiet, not that she could say anything.

"So I assume you are aware of the nearest hospitable planet?"

"Satoria."

"Are we seriously that far out?"

"Yes. If we're lucky, we can get there in the next half an hour."

"Well, this day has gone from bad to shit. At least nothing too bad has-"

A laser fired straight at the tail, locking the Milano into climb.

Quill had been so kind that he even jinxed them into turning their day from shit to hell. 

Fabulous.