Falling -Faberry

Chapter 7

Quinn's POV 

I wake up and light is burning my eyes like it did that first morning when I woke up at her  house. I groan at the thought of my lover and turn into the chest holding me. But I turn into nothing. Where is he? I put a hand over my eyes while I stretch my arm out and scour the empty bed.

"Puck." I call out but to no avail. "Puck!" I call out louder. "PUCK!" I yell and hear footsteps quickening. 

"Chill Momma I am right here." Puck sits down on the bed in front of me. I wrap my arms around him and he rests an arm on me. 

"Where did you go?" I feel his arm against me and it occurs to me that I don't have a shirt on. I shamefully pull the blanket up so he doesn't see my half naked body. 

"I went to the bathroom. I woke up before you, I tried escaping your grasp many times but you clung to me for dear life. When I finally did free myself I didn't think I woke you up," He leans down and puts his forehead on mine. "but I did. Sorry I woke you up." He pulls his head away from mine and gets off the bed. 

"Come back." I reach for him but he isn't there. Something soft is thrown against me. 

"Put a shirt on please." I finally peel open my eyes and am happy to see Puck standing in front of me with a form fitting tank top and jeans on. He must have changed because he did not have a shirt or those jeans on when I fell asleep last night, he was definitely wearing some kind of soft shorts. "It was hard enough sleeping next to you when you were shirtless. I don't need to see you in a compromising situation." 

"Since when do you not want to see a girls breasts." I pull the plain yellow shirt over my head. 

"Since the rack belongs to you." I stand up and meet Puck in the middle of my room. 

"Wasn't a problem for you last night." I raise the eyebrow and purse my lips at him. He licks his bottom lip and turns his head away from me. 

"I couldn't really argue with a heartbroken," All the memories from last night come flying back and I stumble back onto my bed. Wait do I have to go to school today. "girl that had her boobs pressed against me." Puck grabs my hand. "I know this is tough but you have to go eat something and get ready for school." When I stand up he puts an arm around my waist to steady me. I rest my head on his shoulder. 

"I..." Can't breath, she betrayed me. Kissed the one person I loath more than anybody in the whole world. But I don't hate him anymore, "I hate her." 

"Quinn come on." Puck disregards my comment as he takes me down stairs. He sits me down at the kitchen table and makes his way into the kitchen. I slump into the chair and flop my head down onto the table. I don't want food or school I want to be held. To be told everything is going to be okay when I know its not. I want the hole in my chest to cease. Puck walks up to me. "I don't know how to cook so I just brought you this." He sets down a couple things on the table in front of me. I can't see them because I am face down. "Come on Momma." He puts his hands on my head and pulls me up. "I just realized you haven't cried yet." My face is expressionless as I meet his eyes. "Sorry just eat something please." Puck pushes a bowl full of cereal and a jug of milk in front of me.   

"No." I stand up and walk away from the table back up to my room. Puck follows me as I slink up the stairs and crash into my bed face first. He stands in the middle of the room and I start to scream into my pillows loudly. My screams are barely muted but I don't care. I think I hear footsteps but I can't tell if they are exiting or entering my room.  A couple minutes pass and I seem to be all alone. A couple more pass and someone sits down next to me. A light hand is places on my back and starts making lazy strokes. 

"Quinnie?" I roll my eyes and turn on my side to look at my mom. "Puck left." 

"No." My head falls deeper into the pillow. And I feel the tears Puck said we absent. Before tears can pour out of my eyes my mom pulls my face in her hands. 

"He is going to school. If you want him go to school." She stands up and starts to walk away. 

"Why are you doing this to me? Let me wallow in my own sorrow." I groan and sit up. 

"Because I am not going to let you have yourself a pity party." With that my mom spins on her heel and walks away. 

I get dressed for school in utter silence, my thoughts racing the whole time. All I could think about was she was never mine she was always someone else's. That someone is Finn or Jesse or Puck's for that matter. I drive to school slower than usual. I can't even see, why am I going places. When I arrive at school I avoid my usual route down the halls because I know she will be there. I almost trip multiple times making my way over to my locker. People turn and stare as I walk, I'm a mess and I don't care. I cling to my locker as I open it. I turn the lock a bunch of times not getting the combo correct. After trying to open my locker for the 4th or 5th time I smack my head against it. Maybe that will take the pain away. I do it again a little harder before trying the lock again. I finally get it open and I duck my head into my locker to get away from reality for a moment. Buzz. The bell rings and takes me back to the reality I don't want to be in. I take my books out of my locker then slam it shut. When I turn around I see the one person I didn't want to see. She stands there with teary eyes just staring up at me. Like she was waiting for me to turn around. I try to pry my eyes away but I can't. No matter how much she hurt me I still can't resist the dwarf. 

"Quinn." Her voice is quiet and hoarse like she has been crying or screaming or both. I force my head to turn but I can't move I am stuck looking at my sad girl. She isn't mine. When I look down at her all I see is Jesse's lips on her's.

"I don't want to look at you." My body finally breaks and I turn away from her. I feel relieved to be away from the girl but it also hurts me to stop looking at her. 

"Please let me explain this to you." She pleads and follows me down the hall. 

"There is nothing to explain." Her hand grips my shoulder and it feels like a flame is being pressed on me. I flinch from her touch and she takes a step back. 

"There is so much to explain. Quinn I love you, I want you and only you." 

"That's the problem I love you so much it hurts. But now I hurt for other reasons." She jumps in front of me to stop me but I avoid her and keep walking down the halls. 

"You don't think I hurt." She places a hand over her heart and I throw my hands in the air. 

"Make this about yourself like you always do." I state as monotone as I can, monotone is my default at this point. "Everything is always about you." I finally stop and face her. Her expression shifts when I glare down at her, she looks horrified. "Since everything is about you. Why don't I let you go free so you can make more things about yourself. Not just things that surround me." 

"Are you breaking up with me?" A single tear spills down her face. 

"What other choice do I have Rachel." Her name makes me want to vomit again. "You hurt me so bad with just 1 kiss. What you did felt like a hot iron plunged straight into my heart. I burn so bad right now." She looks down at her shoes and takes a  deep breath. 

"You said..." 

"Sounds like the same thing you said when Finn broke up with you." I take a step closer to her so she has no choice but to look into my eyes and feel my pain and fury. "You suck, I am done with you." I spin on my heel and walk away. 

"You said you would never stop loving me." She goes on with the rant that I shut down before. 

"And I probably will never stop loving you. That's what happens with your first love." With that I walk into class and sit down next to Brittany. I lean into her and she wraps an arm around me. 

"Q, what's wrong?" Brittany asks in a sweet calm tone. I feel the tears again. I hurt even more now that I finally broke her  free of me. I didn't think I could hurt this bad. Last night I thought it was as bad as it could get but I was wrong, so very wrong. I can't stop the tears as they start streaming down my face. Brittany pulls me out of the room into the hallway as not to disrupt the class. I pull away from Brittany, she tries following me as I run down the halls but I am to quick for her to catch. I start scream-crying all the way down the halls and into the bathroom near the choir room. I want it to go away I want the pain away. I collapse down in a stall as I cry my head off. All the pain from the last few weeks of Jesse's terror over our relationship bursts through me as I scream.  

I don't know who or how he got here but Puck rushes to my side to comfort me. He is in the girls bathroom holding me on the floor as I sob into his shoulder. I spend the rest of the day clinging to him. We skip the classes we don't have together and go spend it in any empty class room I can find. I haven't cried since the episode in the bathroom and I feel like a zombie, I bet I also look like a zombie. Puck and I skip glee club and go to the mall. Why the mall, I don't really know. I don't want people seeing me like this but it's where he dragged me. We sit in the food court as I stare at the slice of pizza on my plate. Puck chows down on his slice and stares at me while I sit looking off into space. 

"Eat and drink." He forces the bottle of water closer to me. 

"I'm not hungry." I watch as a couple walks past, hand in hand probably in love. I stick up my middle finger to rid myself of them. Puck puts his hand over mine before someone sees. 

"Quinn be nice." He takes another bite of his pizza. 

"Why did you even bring me here? I want to go home."  

"I want to show you something but you have to eat this first." He points down at the food in front of me. I pick up the flimsy pizza and take a big bite. It tastes like nothing, am I even chewing? I force another bite in my mouth before Puck stops me. "Okay please stop doing that with your face." 

"What I am eating." I open the water and take a sip then another and another. This time I am not forcing myself to do it I am genuinely thirsty. All the crying drained me.  

"You look like a fish a miserable fish." Puck grabs the pizza off of my plate. "May I?" 

"Yeah it tastes like dirt anyway." I usually like this pizza but right now I hate it. I hate everything right now.  He takes a big bite of my half eaten pizza and stands up. He walks up behind me and scoots my chair out. 

"Lets go Momma I gotta show you something." Puck commands and I slowly stand up. We walk across the mall and into a book store.  

"I am surprised you even know what a bookstore is." I scowl as Puck leads me over to the back of the store. 

"I didn't know what one was til a couple of weeks ago." I lean on the bookshelves as Puck pulls out a book. I instantly recognize 'Wuthering Heights' by Emily Bronte. How the hell does Puck know who Bronte is? I stand leering at him as he flips through the pages of the big book. "I learned about this Bronte dude and..." 

"Bronte is a women. Emily Bronte that's her name. And she is a women." I watch as he starts to slow down his flipping, he is looking for a certain page. 

"I learned that she was really cool and smart and stuff like that." He lands on a page and scours it for a second before handing the book to me and pointing to a quote. "Page 160, 4th paragraph." Puck states as I look over the quote. "Kiss me again; and don't let me see your eyes! I forgive what you have done to me. I love my murderer-but yours. How can I?" Puck wasn't even looking at the book when he said that famous quote. He memorized it for who knows what reason. I reread the quote over and over.  "It means..." 

"I already know what it means. It means you will never forgive yourself for hurting your significant other." I throw the book at him. "Why are you showing me this?"