"Here I go again on my own! Going down the only road ive ever known!" I sang to myself as I made pancakes.
"Well someones a good singer." I heard Justice say from behind me.
"Me? Nah, im just a dumbass, now go tell everyone that pancakes are done." I said.
"Ok." She said while walking away. I walked upstairs into my room and sat on the bed. I turned on my Switch and started playing Smash Bros.
"GET FUCKED BITCH, AINT NO ONE GONNA BEAT MY BOI GAME AND WATCH!" Y/N yelled as he won another online match. He proceeded to get matched with a certain demon girl he lives with.
"Oh shit Malina plays this? Anyways game time." Y/N said. Y/N of course, picked the best waifu, Solid Snake. Malina picked the one and only weegee. An epic battle then proceeded and I'm not going to write it because I suck at fight scenes. I also lied, it was completely one sided and Y/N won. He turned off the game and stood up.
"I'm fucking bored... What do I do?" He asked himself. "Oh wait, I live with demon girls im sure I can figure something out. He then ventured out of his room, on an exposition for the one thing all youtubers whore themselves out for. Content. Not that Y/N was a youtuber. He found a strange sight. The Cerberus triplets and Judgement... Torturing Modeus? I dont fucking know they were holding her hand and giving her headpats. Weird.
"Thats kinky." I said, causing them to jump in surprise. "Need some help?"
"Y/N you pervert!" Modeus yelled.
"I'm bored as fuck, fight me." I said as I gave her a headpat. This caused her to... Moan? "NOPE FUCK THAT IM OUTTA HERE!" i yelled while running away.
"What are you running from?" Justice asked.
"A fucking pervert, thats what." I answered.
"What?" She asked.
"Cerberus and Judgement are giving Modeus headsets and hand holds." I answered.
"Oh... Ok." She said, walking away. I then proceeded to walk back into my room and imploded. Well, not really, but it was close enough. What actually happened was much more complicated, so just take that answer.
What?
You wanna know what happened?
Really?
No.
If thats you agai- GOD DAMN IT! Why are you so fucking persistent? What was that? Oh. I guess that snorting mountains of coccain can do that to someone.
Anyways, what actually happened is, I honestly just fell on my bed and fell asleep. That's it. Azazel woke me up about half an hour later, and I woke up feeling tired as shit and ready to die, so nothing changed. I walked down to the kitchen and pulled out the amazing new piece of dish washing technology, the KITCHEN GUN!
Wait what? What do you mean that not part of the script? I don't get paid if I don't read it right? Well fuck you too then.
Fine, I went down to the kitchen and pleased the orange cat god by making lasagna. That's about how the day went. I made pancakes, played video games, saw some cursed Modeus shit, and then sat on the couch watching TV. That is until everyone decided that they too, were going to sit on the couch. At that point, the universe decided to open a wormhole directly inside of my body, hence the implosion. Not to worry though, that what the immortality is for.
After recovering from the implosion, I saw what seemed to be a time portal. How do I know that it's a time portal specifically? Well it had semi transparent clocks around it, so I made an educated guess. Through the portal, I saw an unfamiliar demon, alongside Lucy in a maid uniform, and Justice holding an apple pie.
"Hey, umm. What the fuck?" I asked my times Lucy.
"I have no idea. That seems to be me... from the future? I certainly don't remember anything like that." She said
"Wait... where's Azazel?" I asked, before seeing her inside of the portal. "Fuck."
"Why's she in the weird time portal?" Malina asked.
"Probably because she was sitting on my lap. Not much room for 12 people on an 8 person couch. Anyways, ima go fucking time travel." I then proceeded to jump into the portal, only for--------
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!!! Error !!!
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---------Upon my arrival through the portal, I saw a giant lab, The aforementioned demons, and a tall horned figure wearing a suit. I was confused, as anyone in my situation would b---
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Corruption present
Attempting to resolve the issue
Error: two instances of the same person at the same time
Delete one?
Yes■ No□
Which?
Y/N□ Subject 667□
Error resolved, no assistance needed
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From what I've learned about this future, Azazel fell, took over hell, and made Lucifer her maid. Always knew she was a closet pervert. Anyways, her new name is Loremaster, and the big horned guy is Subject 667. I was hanging out with said Subject 667 when------
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Message from administrator:
This is the Helltaker, are you receiving this message? I'm attempting a new method of contact. If you receive this, respond to this specific part of the chapter. I've gained access to the authors "comment section", but it will only last until 12:00 am on June 5th, 2021.
!!! ERROR !!!
No authorized administrators
Deleting message
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Suddenly, another time portal opened. This portal was undeniably my world. I bid my farewells, and into the portal I went, alongside Azazel of course. Upon my arrival back, I explained what had happened to the rest of the girls, and proceeded to fall face-first into my bed.
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