2 Truths & a Lie | Grayson Dolan

two

reese, 3/18/2018

he just breathes in. but i see he's flushed as the words pass out my mouth. husband. he must have thought it would have been him. it would have been. it still will be. i hope. but he doesn't know anything about liam. he has no idea at all. so i stand there, his cheeks now puffed, liam greeting them in his soft and kind voice and me, looking like a complete idiot.

he must think i just cheated. he must think me to be insane. inhumane maybe. but i swear, it wasn't what he thought it was at all. i just needed him to give me a moment, a chance to explain. grayson fumbles with the buttons on the cuffs of his sleeves, trying his best to be nice to liam. but i know him, he wants to gorge his eyes out, kick something. i can see it in his face, even though he's trying to conceal it as hard as he can.

liam has taken a seat next to grayson, on my old spot and i walk back into the kitchen, just to breathe for a moment. i stand by the sink, just looking into it. i try to focus on my breathing, just to get my mind onto something else. something leaks out of my eye and spools down my skin of my cheek. why was i crying? there was no point in that. but still, more and more come, filling my face with salty water. there's the sound of feet shuffling behind me and i look up, seeing him standing there.

he's quiet, holds up two glasses and places them on the counter. i can't even bare to look him in his eyes. i wipe my cheek and clear my throat, turning around and leaning my hip against the hard marble. "would you like some more water?", i ask him and bite down on my lip, wrapping one of my wrists with the fingers of the other. he breathes in heavily and exhales, looking down at his shoes.

"no, thank you.", he mumbles. just hearing his voice made me crumble inside, wanting to touch him again, to feel his warmth on my skin. i needed to. but how could i make him understand? "grayson, he's not what you think he is.", i whisper and he closes his eyes, hiding himself from
me. his tongue traces his lower lip as he tries to find something to say. i'm shivering, and it's not even that cold in the apartment. it's just my heart that's cold. my body. my soul.

"he's your husband, for crying out loud.", he finally says and slowly turns to me, his eyebrows drooping. he was heartbroken, i could feel it in the air. i fumble with the blue ribbon on my ring finger. that's the only thing there. i lift up my hand to show him. "i swear, it's not what you think. it's just hard to...explain.", i stammer and try to step towards him but he turns away from me, sighing heavily. "no.", he grumbles and i look down at my hands.

i had no words to say. nothing could change what happened. "grayson, i don't love him. not the way i love you.", i choke on my words as i say them but he just shakes his head, tapping his foot on the floor. "you can't say that. you know you can't.", he snaps at me and i jump back, shocked at his reaction. he wasn't usually this way. something had changed him over time. i believe i was the cause of it. i sigh.

"please, listen to me. i can't tell you what liam
is but i want you.", i gulp back my tears. then liam walks in and i smile at him delicately. "hey.", i mumble and turn back to the sink. liam steps up next to me and bends over my shoulder, cupping a hand around my ear. "is this him?", he whispers and i nod slightly. grayson was looking away from us, his figure stiff. he looked as beautiful as i remember, just that he had aged along the years.

liam nods in reply and retreats, turning towards grayson. "you're welcome to stay for dinner.", he tells him and grayson looks at him, a fake smile played across his lips. but liam wouldn't know. only i knew graysons visage and could read through each and every face he made. "i'd love to, and i'm sure ethan would, too, but he's...uhm...vegan?", he answers and liam laughs lightly.

"what a coincidence. so is reese.", he turns to me and winks. i roll my eyes playfully at him, trying to forget the tension between me and my soulmate. "i try.", i add and grayson looks at me. his pupils widen and he chuckles, sending my heart into a frenzy. "i'm making risotto, if that's okay.", i conclude and he nods. "is it okay if i, uhm, help? i just want to learn how to cook better.", he stammers and i stifle my laugh.

"of course.", i reply and liam walks towards one of the cupboards, opening it and taking out four plates. "i'll set the table.", he states, not like that wasn't obvious, and smirks towards me when grayson isn't looking and leaves us both behind as he walks away. i inch towards grayson and take his hand. he doesn't pull back from me, but his expression is puzzled. i'm not sure wether i can find the words to explain this to him.

he closes his fingers around my hand and his thumb brushes over my skin, sending tingles all over my body. "gray.", i mumble and he looks down at our intertwined hands. "yes, essie?", he answers and i smile. i hadn't heard that nickname for a long time. "i will explain it to you, okay? just, not now.", i whisper so quietly that i'm afraid he wouldn't be able to hear me. but he nods and let's my hand go, tugging at the blue ribbon. he sighs and finally tilts his head up to look at me. "reese, i...", he begins and bites his lip, shaking his head slightly.

"i love you, too"

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xx,cece