2 Truths & a Lie | Grayson Dolan

seven

reese, 3/24/18

it was so weird, having him here, but it felt so perfect, so right and familiar. the feeling was contradicting and i was having a sort of euphoric thrill. i've only felt this once before in my life.

the night i met him. the night i fell in love with him. my body felt like it weighed nothing, like i was even walking but rather floating as i walked him upstairs, showing him the different rooms.

neither of us really bothered to glance at the rooms though. his eyes were interlocked with mine the entire time and i swear i could hear his thoughts as i kept on blabbing on about this artifact here and there.

in liam's old bedroom, i guide him to the balcony, which had an overlook of the backyard garden. it was huge, the grass as green as you can picture it with the sky contrasting against it in a pale blue.

the water of the extravagant pool shimmered in the sunlight and my grip around graysons hand tightens, a sigh escaping my lips. he moves to stand behind me and pushes my hair aside, leaning down, pressing his lips to the skin of my neck.

i hitch my breathing and lean into him, fighting the urge to turn around and kiss him. i couldn't do this here. not while we were so exposed. but it felt like it was supposed to be this way.

"stop.", i mumble and he obeys, letting go of my hand and stepping away from me. he knew what risky game we were playing and i felt terrible for dragging him into it.

i turn to face him and the look of dismay on his face is apparent. i put my hand on his clean shaved cheek and rub my thumb across his clearly defined cheekbone. he aged well.

"i wish i didn't have to put you through this.", he whispers and i shake my head violently, putting my thumb on his lips to silence him. i frown and shut my eyes.

"oh, god, grayson, you're not putting me through anything. i did. this and this is on me.", i contradict but when i open my eyes i can tell he doesn't believe me, doesn't want to.

i pull my hand away and push my hair out of my face, behind my ear. "i have it all planned out, gray, but you need to give it time. you need to understand that i can't just drop everything and leave. not that you're expecting that, but if i could i would.", i stammer and he sighs, running a hand through his hair.

the fact that he's dressed so appropriately today does not help me at all to deal with my oppression of my desires. i just wanted to feel him, his chest, the sweat on his skin, everything. i gulp and look away, flushing.

"i know that, essie.", he mutters. just at the sound of his deep voice saying that nickname he made just for me could make me crumble. i flinch and take in a deep breath, unknowing of what to even say.

"you are the best thing that has happened to me and i will wait, no matter how long it takes, because i know you will come to me eventually.", he fills the void of silence and i am so close to crying.

i don't know what i did to deserve this beautiful, caring being. i hadn't done anything spectacular or worthy to even be in his vicinity. i knew i would come to him, he was the only person who truly understood what i felt.

"thank you.", i whisper, loss for words evident, and he takes my hand again, squeezing it once tightly before letting it go again. i shiver and shut my eyes, biting my lip.

"i'll give you a breather.", he says and i nod slowly. i needed it. "i'll tell them you're in the restroom.", he adds and before i actually realize it, he's walking away from me, exiting the room and closing the door behind him softly.

i whimper at the loss of his presence and turn around, leaning against the banister of the balcony. i can see liam and his parents guiding ethan, harley and laurel towards the patio with the tea tables set.

the carnations mrs. esvant and i had planted wete in full bloom, the bright red blossoms glowing like little torches of fire. i breathe in slowly and bite my lip, watching liam talk with ethan, gesticulating wildly with a big smile on his face.

i straighten up and feel my heart hammering in my chest, seeing grayson appear from underneath the balcony, his hands tucked into his dress pants, crossing the lawn to meet the others with a welcoming smile.

i feel horrendous, like a liar.

i can't believe in playing this double life game with him. he didn't deserve someone who did that to him. he needed me, either completely or not at all. and nobody else could really have me as much as he could so i really had no choice.

i dig my nails into the palms of my hands, eyeing the blue velvet ribbon on his wrist. i had to do it, no matter how embarrassing it was going to be, not matter how much explaining i would have to tend to.

i needed him.

so i run. i run downstairs, almost running into the servant with the tea cups, and rush into the outdoors, pacing as fast as i could to the others. grayson turns to me in confusion and liam eyes me nervously. i look at him as if to apologize in advance before i jump up and wrap my arms around grayson.

i'm kissing him before he can even react and it feels so damn good.

-

wow hoky, it's been long since i've been on this book oof. i just am no longer so interested in the twins anymore (hence the username change on most of my socials). i don't know exactly what happened aboyt some sort of party or something they attended but in my opinion they have been becoming more like their stage personalities everyday. i miss the old and goofy them and i know that the change is irreversible but i just feel that they aren't even genuine anymore, neither to us nor themselves.
(sorry about the rant haha i was just wanting to get that off my chest)

anyways, hope you guys enjoyed that! i'll definitely be finishing this book, don't worry:)

xx,cece