If I can't have you

Chapter 24

Yet again, Nico woke to a world of pain. A searing pain was creeping its way up his leg and his jaw felt stiff and tense. A flare of pain occurred when he clenched his teeth down so he quickly relaxed his jaw in an attempt to lessen the pain. He tried to open his eyes but it seemed almost as if they had been glued down and weights had been attached. With a large effort, he managed to force them to open and was greeted with a blurry version of yet again another hospital room. He made an attempt to try and talk but all that came out was a low groan. There was clearly someone in the room because as soon as the groan left his lips, there was a flurry of activity and someone's head leaned over into his eye line. He blinked frantically to try and clear the blur from his eyes.

His vision became clearer and Levi's head came into focus. Nico let out another groan and tried to lift his hand towards his boyfriend. He found his hand to be too heavy and it flopped back down into the bed. Levi saw the effort that he'd attempted and picked up the hand to give it a squeeze. When Levi's eyes met Nico's, Nico could see that his eyes were filled with tears. He tried to form a sentence for several seconds before eventually managing to choke out "You're crying." Levi let out a chocked laugh before reaching up to wipe desperately at his eyes.

"It's because you scared me, you idiot," Levi replied giving Nico a small shove to accompany his response. Nico let out a hiss of pain as his leg shifted and his eyes screwed up in pain. He felt Levi's hand start to stroke through his hair in an attempt to soothe his pain and he began to relax in response to his touch. "What happened?" He asked, trying to keep the pain out of his voice in order to try and not alarm Levi. There was an long silence after he asked that question that made Nico cracked his eyes open again to look at Levi. He was stood there, biting on his lower lip which Nico took as a sign that he was nervous and that there was something that his boyfriend was holding back from him. "Levi?" He asked again, putting a note in his voice that suggested that Levi had better start talking.

Levi stood there fidgeting for a few more seconds before lifting his eyes off the far corner of the bed and looking at his boyfriend. "You had another seizure," he muttered.

Nico signed and threw his head back on the pillow. "I can figure that much out, Levi. My heads telling me that much," he said, the sarcasm dripping from his voice. Levi's eyes filled with tears and Nico reached out a hand to grab Levi's. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I shouldn't have snapped but if this is something important that your keeping from me, I need to know." He was cut off by another flash of pain flaring up through his leg.

"Links going to need to operate on your leg again. The seizure was pretty bad and you starting hitting your leg against the edge of the bed," Levi confessed gesturing to the metal bed frame that marked the edge of the bed and he watched as the blood drain from Nico's face. Nico's hands balled up on top of the mattress and a tear started to slip down his cheek. He lifted a hand to furiously wipe the tear away as the door opened and Amelia and Link entered. Link smiled a sad smile as he saw the tear tracks on Nico's face.

"I guess Levi told you what happened," Link stated, leaning against the door frame while Amelia moved forward towards the bed. Nico nodded sadly before rolling his head around so his eyes could track Amelia as she walked across the room. She grabbed the pen light out of her pocket before flicking it on to check his eyes reaction. Giving him the all clear, she gave his shoulder a tight squeeze before slipping out of the room and leaving Link, Levi and Nico alone.

"So you're going to have to operate again?" Nico asked with a sad hint to his voice. Link pushed himself off the door frame and stepped into the room.

"Yeah. You did some pretty serious damage in that seizure. Rebroke the bone so I'm going to have to go and restructure that cage of yours. We'll have to push back your physical therapy of course." Link explained. Levi looked concerned and Nico felt a wave of sadness crash over him. He was putting his precious Levi under so much stress and through so much pain that he didn't deserve. He could practically feel his heart breaking.

############

Levi wasn't supposed to be up in the gallery. In fact he was supposed to be on rounds right now but he couldn't help himself. He'd slipped away in the middle of Andrew DeLuca explaining the case of an elderly woman who had some sort of gangrene set in her leg that had spread to the bone and sneaked up to the gallery of OR2. Down in the operating room, Link was operating on the mess that was Nico's leg and Levi knew he had to watch. To make sure that nothing went wrong and if it did, to ensure he knew exactly what had gone wrong in order to be there for Nico and support him.

There was a clattering sound as the door to the gallery opened and DeLuca walked in. Levi uncurled himself from where he sat and stood up, already starting to apologise before DeLuca had even had the opportunity to close the door. He raised his hand to stop Levi in his tracks and Levi just stood there, shamefaced.

"Levi, do you really think I wouldn't notice your little disappearing act? I grew up with Caterina for Pete's sake." DeLuca stated with an eyebrow raised. Levi shook his head. He wouldn't embarrass himself infront of DeLuca by trying to lie to him. He just continued to listen as DeLuca continued to talk. "I know your worried about Nico but Levi, you're putting your entire medical career at risk here. I know that Nico wouldn't want that." Levi nodded shamefully but before DeLuca could continue, he was interrupted by the squeal of wheels as a bed moved out of the OR below. Link had obviously finished up with Nico's leg and was sending him back to the ICU. Levi looked at DeLuca who let out a sigh before stepping back and allowing Levi to slip out the door and run down to the ICU.

An hour later, he saw Nico's eyes start to move before his eye lids started to peel open and land on Levi. His eyes filled with tears and Levi leaned forward to rub his hand to try and soothe him. "Your supposed to be at work," Nico managed to murmur. Levi just nodded and said "I had to be there for when you wake up." Nico took a deep breath and came out with something that Levi never thought he would say.

"Levi, I'm done. I don't want to be your boyfriend any more. Can you please leave now?"