Lost Bonds

Chapter 2: Shoto

I can't deal with this. I can't do it anymore. People are asking me if I'm okay, how my old man is, what happened. No, I'm not okay, I haven't been since I was 4. My old man is better than ever, since he's got everything he's wanted. And what's happened? He's got the fame and love he's always wanted, and his family are left to live with the emotional struggle he's burdened us with. I locked myself in my room to avoid the rest of 1-A.

No surprise, Midoyia is knocking on my door. I hear his high pitched voice ask, "are you okay, Todoroki? You've been locked in your room for quite a while now, it's not good for you." I don't answer, I don't want to speak. He starts speaking again, "I don't know if you're awake, but if you are, Mr. Aizawa told someone to tell you that you have permission to take a temporary absence to see your family."

That's the last thing I need. An excuse to go see him, a reason to miss training that I need. I guess I can see Natsuo and Fuyumi. I don't see them as much as I'd like to, I barely know them. Of course, that's also my old man's fault. Everything is his fault. I'm happy that he isn't dead, but I'm also annoyed that he isn't. I won't, no, can't forgive him for anything. Just because he's trying a little and fighting some crazy powerful villains doesn't mean he's a good person.

He sees me as an experiment, not a son. A tool to show his power. But now, since All Might retired, I'm useless. The damage repaired itself, and now I'm unneeded. He's only still showing interest in me to keep up the façade of being a good dad, and a good person. People think he can be the Symbol of Justice and Peace, so he doesn't need me to surpass him or All Might.

I suddenly register the faint treading of feet, indicating that Midoryia left. He made me realise a lot of my resentfulness was useless, and only held me back. He's the reason I can use my left side without fear or guilt. I never even showed how truly grateful I am for that act. I wouldn't be at the level I'm at if not for him.

But first, I need to see my old man. I have to keep up the facade of him being an amazing dad, and my scald scar and my mother's hospitalisation was just a big accident. Who knows the chaos that would come if we don't. Losing the top two heroes so quickly would break Japan. I put on a jacket and a pair of shoes, and unlock my door.

I step out. Instantly, several of my classmates pounce on me. Their questions blur together as I just tell them, "I'm not in their mood for a Q&A. I may tell you more later." I walk past them as if they're not there, and leave Heights Alliance. I'm fairly fast at my usual walking pace, so I get to the hospital quickly. The receptionist gives me his ward name and room number. A short walk leads me to the right door, with Fuyumi and Natsuo outside it.

"Ah, you're here now. We wanted to said for you," Fuyumi tells me. I nod in thanks, "are we allowed in?" Natsuo answers, "yeah. Wish we didn't have to, though." I nod once again, I wish I didn't have to maintain this mask. "Natsu! Don't say that. People can hear you. And anyway, we're all being happy and supportive today. That goes for you too, Shoto," Fuyumi lectures. We both nod, and Natsuo mutters an apology and a promise to be on his best behaviour.

She pushes the door open. Endeavour is sitting up in his hospital bed, clearly restless. Bandages cover the left side of his face, including his eye. Oh, karma can be both a blessing and a curse at times. Natsuo sits at one of the chairs by his bed, and pushes it so he's far away from him, but not to the point that any nurses or doctors peering in would be suspicious. Fuyumi takes a seat on the other side of his bed. I sit next to Natsuo, also pushing my chair away slightly.

"Hi, dad, how are you feeling?" Fuyumi tries to break the ice-like tension between us all. "I feel like shit. The bandages itch, I'm drained from the healing, this hospital robe is stupid and the bed is uncomfortable," he moans. Natsuo snorts, "not even glad you're alive? Or that you finally get the recognition as the number one hero you've wanted all your career?" I just listen in. I have nothing to say. "Natsu! You promised!" Fuyumi chimes in.

Endeavour looks at him, "I'm not truly number one. Its because he failed, I didn't succeed." The way he spat his words told us exactly who he was talking about. "So now what? All of this was for nothing? Driving your wife to insanity was for nothing? Neglecting your children, sorry, failed experiments was for nothing. Emotionally torturing Shoto was for nothing? Killing Toya was for nothing!?" Natsuo yells, "now that your one goal is out of your reach, you just give up and pretend that the last 25 or so years never happened?"

Fuyumi stands up and says, "Natsuo, stop it. This isn't helping. Dad knows that he can't make it all vanish, but he's trying to make up for some of the damage. You know that he's talki-" she's cut off by Endeavour. "I'm not trying to reverse the damage. I'm trying to show that its possible for me to change. That fight, I knew I could have called for backup at any time. I knew I could have avoided the damage to my face. But I didn't. And that's because I wanted to show you three that I can change. I'm no longer the runner up in a rigged game. I'm going to become the Symbol of Peace."

"I don't expect any of you to forgive me. I won't expect your mother to once she's released. I wouldn't expect Toya to if he was still here. I just want the peace of mind that you at least recognise my attempt at trying to heal this family." I get up, I can't listen to this any more. "Shoto, where are you going?" he asks me. I reply, "I don't know. I just can't listen to this crap anymore. It doesn't sound sincere, and it never will. Not from you. The person that also told me that I shouldn't see my siblings. The person that told me that I need to surpass the person I admire most."

I leave, not giving him the chance to say anything else. I walk out to a secluded area and sit down. I can't bottle it all up anymore, I'm coming apart at the seams. I let myself sob while I can. I can't even cry from the scalded side of my face without experiencing severe pain. It's all his fault! Its his fault I'm this broken thing. Everything is his--

Footsteps. Fast ones. They get fainter, indicating that someone is running away. I don't have the strength to see who was watching me. I don't have the strength to care. I just stay there, frozen, hoping to forget everything.

Word Count: 1250