stuck :: hemmings

eleven.

I stepped out of the restroom with my head in a fog of confusion. How in the ever living hell did someone like Luke exist? Who could exert such confidence and not feel a twinge of embarrassment in their shameless flirting?

My thoughts were interrupted by a wild-eyed Ashton approaching me.

"There you are, Jesus Christ." He took me by the wrist. "The show is starting soon, come on."

"How was your alone time with Michael?" I couldn't help but joke, watching Ashton turn around to look at me with an irritable expression. "Did you guys enjoy a romantic mozzarella stick dinner?"

"Fuck off." He grumbled, continuing to drag me through the crowd. I bumped into a small girl and barely had time to apologize before she was swallowed up by the mass of people. "You know I only did it for you."

"Well, you did a terrible job," I commented.

"It's not my fault." Ashton protested. "Maybe the universe just doesn't want you to be with Michael."

"Ah yes, I'm sure it's part of the universes' grand scheme to make you a terrible wingman." I giggled. He finally stopped once he'd pushed our way to the front row.

"How did you enjoy your alone time with tube boy?" He countered, a satisfied smile taking over his face when he watched my expression change.

"I don't know, he's weird." I couldn't help but admit.

"No shit sherlock." Ashton snorted.

"Who's weird?" Both of us turned to see Luke looking at us with a lazy smile. I felt my cheeks warm.

"Michael. He's a strange guy." Ashton answered simply, taking a sip of his drink.

"Speaking of Michael, have you guys seen him? I've looked everywhere."

"Oh yeah, he left. They closed the kitchen for the night and he went to the McDonalds across the street to get some food." Ashton said while scrolling through his phone with his free hand.

"Munchies are a bitch," I responded.

Luke pursed his lips together. "Mind if I stay with you two?"

"Fine with me," I answered, Ashton simply nodding. The lights started to dim as Sabrina and her band took the stage. She saw me in the front row, sticking out her tongue and flashing a peace sign. I laughed and gave her one back.

Once everything was set up, a boy with blue hair and a lip ring stood in front of the microphone. "I'd ask how everyone is doing tonight but I don't really care. Anyway, we're the Drunk Vegans and anyone over the age of thirty is going to hate us."

Cheers and whistles erupted from the crowd as they began to play. I watched Sabrina on the drums, always surprised at how toned her arms were whenever she wore a tank top.

I was suddenly aware of how close Luke was, his shoulder occasionally brushing mine due to the movement of himself and the crowd. My mind bounced between the dream I had of him weeks ago and our odd encounter in the restroom. I must have been staring because he turned to look at me, an amused expression taking over his features that were reflected by the blue lights. I quickly turned my attention to the stage, knowing the last thing the arrogant boy needed was another female gaping at him. It had only gotten hotter inside the small bar and all of its patrons were huddled in the small area in front of the stage. It started to feel like everyone was too close. The air was getting stuffier and I felt like cattle being pressed against each other. I suddenly began to feel lightheaded, all of the bodies around me beginning to blur. My heartbeat pounded against my chest as panic rose in my throat. I desperately grabbed for Ashton's hand but couldn't find it. He was no longer next to me and my breath was coming out quickly as I felt more difficulty getting in the air. I tried to push my way towards the exit but too many bodies prevented a clear escape. I squeezed my eyes shut and started to sink to the floor when someone was behind me, arms cupping my shoulders and a reassuring body pressed against my back. I looked up to see the blurred face of Luke, the minimal lighting enough to see his eyes furrowed in concern and mouth pulled into a worried frown.

"My anxiety, I need to go." I managed to choke out, trying to be heard against the wild banging of drums and wail of a guitar. I didn't know if he'd heard me, but Luke wasted no time putting an arm around my torso and pushing his way through the crowd. I started counting down from twenty in my head, trying to control my breathing as my therapist had taught me. I hadn't even noticed we'd gotten to the door until Luke pushed it open and the night engulfed me. I breathed in the humid air smelling of concrete and fried food. Relief flooded through my body at the open space. My breathing was starting to return to normal.

"Hey, are you okay? Brooklyn?" Luke's voice brought me back to where I was. I straightened myself out and gave him an apologetic smile. I didn't have the energy to feel embarrassed that he'd witnessed my mini panic attack, only relief that I was finally out of the bar.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks for taking me outside." I ran fingers through my hair which was a matted, sweaty mess.

"Does that happen a lot?" Luke asked. "Like, every time you're in a big crowd?"

"No, not really. It's kind of random. Usually when I'm already tired and my social battery is drained it happens more often."

"Damn, that sucks." Coming from anyone else the words may sound insincere, but Luke had a way of making it sound like he really did care. "Was it a panic attack?"

"Kind of," I answered. It was nowhere close to a full-on panic attack, an occurrence that rarely happened and was triggered by more than just a crowded bar. 

"And you promise you're feeling better now?"

"Yeah." I paused. "I don't think I'm going to go back inside, though."

"Understandable." Luke jammed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He looked up at the night sky before his eyes focused back on me. "Did you want to go somewhere else?"

Yes. "I probably just need to go home."

"Are you sure?" Before I could answer, Luke spoke again. "Look, before you say no; I have this awesome place that I think will help."

Part of my brain, the logical part, was screaming at me to leave, knowing I had homework and class early the next morning. Sabrina's words of caution were at the forefront of my mind, he has a girlfriend. But another part of me didn't care. That part couldn't forget how it felt to be pressed against him and how his smell made me lightheaded. It reminded me of his blue eyes and laugh, how having Luke's attention felt like winning some sort of lottery.

It didn't take a rocket scientist to know which part won the fight.