depth of darkness || nakahara chuuya x reader

20

as you'd expected, chuuya sat up straight away after you told him he was fine where he was, his face reddening even further, and you saw a slight break in his unending confidence.

you couldn't sleep. too busy going over everything in your head. how had everything you've been through lead you here? if you changed something so small in your past, would you be somewhere else right now? of course you would be. if you had only decided to stay home that day so many years ago, you would never have gained these insane powers. you would never have been introduced into the world of assassination and massacres. you would probably be home, in your own bed, fast asleep.

home.

a place where you belong.

what does that word even mean for someone who belongs nowhere?

mori has reminded you on countless occasions that your place in the port mafia was special, and everyone was lucky to have you. that no matter what happens you have a place among the mafioso's.

but do you belong here? right at this moment, do you belong in the port mafia, like a home that you dreamed about for so long. you'd dreamed about a place where you could be safe within the arms of your parents, even long after you'd forgotten what having a home really felt like.

you thought you knew what it was supposed to feel like, but you just can't figure it out anymore.

by the time the sun had risen, you had drifted in and out of fitful sleep. mostly, your night had consisted of thinking. lots and lots of thinking. but you have nothing to do today, and a day to get your mind off of everything sounds nice.

you reluctantly get out of bed, and throw on a short black dress, made from a soft fabric. the light material was made tight around the waist, but the skirt part of it flows nicely to your mid thigh.

you head to the bathroom to apply a light coat of casual makeup, and brush out your hair, leaving it down to rest against your back after you'd put on a black leather jacket, and a pair of combat boots to match.

before you could change your mind, you stepped out of your room, beginning to make your way down the port mafia corridors, taking in the heat of the suns rays as they reach you through the window.

you step into the elevator after a small wait, watching the floors tick by as the elevator goes down, taking you to the front entrance of the building.

as you step into the cool air of the afternoon, you find yourself walking in the exact opposite direction you planned to go in, shrugging to yourself as you simply follow the sidewalk, glancing at every interesting looking shop and restaurant, attempting to decide what it is you'd like to do first.

you find yourself stepping into a calm, sweet scented candle shop, different colored candles lined up neatly on the shelves around the room.

for a few minutes you make idle chat with the person at the cash register, working up your social skills in casual conversation. you ask about her favorite scented candles, and which shelf you could find pumpkin scented candles.

not long after you're leaving the quaint little candle shop with a bag of a few lovely candles, perfect for your room back at HQ.

you take your time buying new clothes, figuring out your own style and aesthetic you would wear. everything was going smoothly. your mood was only lighting up further as eventually the sun began to set, and you had racked up quite a few bags of clothes, candles, small chocolates from a very inviting chocolate shop, and a new bout of confidence.

you took the time to admire the city at night, and even stopped to grab some late dinner in a low profile restaurant. today you had learned that taking the time to treat yourself, and get yourself things every once in a while can really do wonders for your confidence. treat yourself like you deserve what you give yourself, and you start to feel like it.

it was getting quite late, and you realized that getting back to the port mafia HQ would not be so difficult this time. you had carefully remembered how you had gotten where you were, and exactly how to retrace your steps to get back.

you stride down the sidewalk, past stores you'd already been by, and diners you didn't bother to visit.

you walked past a particular bar you hadn't noticed before, the door opening and closing with the right of someone leaning on it, and you nearly fell over as they stumbled out onto the sidewalk, directly into your side.

you turn sharply towards the culprit, a menacing glare on your features as you regain your balance. whoever had just tainted your first perfect day would pay dearly.

unfortunately, the rant on the top of your tongue died as you stared into the azure eyes of  the executive who you'd built a strange relationship with. as of on cue butterflies erupted in your stomach, the feeling of your heart squeezing out of your chest taking hold of you and you nearly did a double take at the suddenness of these emotions.

chuuya's eyes were slightly wide, his cheeks and nose red with intoxication as he stares at you, seemingly waiting for you to speak.

"you just bumped into me." is the only sentence that coherently forms in your mind, and you find the words tumbling out of your mouth before you even have time to think of them.

a small, amused smirk plays at the corners of the executives mouth, and he adjusts his hat with a gloved hand.

"what are you doing out here?" he asks, blatantly ignoring your previous statement, as he gestures to the streets around you.

you shrug, glancing towards the passing cars. "shopping." you answer, a bored drawl to your tone as you respond.

he begins to nod in understanding, before realization dawns on his face. "at this time of night?"

your heart melts at the quizzical expression on his face, and you decide not to answer his question.

"come all the way out here to get shit-faced?" you tease, an amused smirk crossing your lips as you speak, adjusting the bangs in your hands.

you and chuuya seem to really be on the same page tonight, because once again the words you speak don't even visibly register on his face, and he gives you a small smile, a new expression in his eyes.

"you really are just so pretty."