Tales of Mohua

Prologue: Ballad of the Heart

There was once a man who loved a woman more than himself.

She was the sun of his world, the light in his eyes, and the warmth radiating through his heart. No one else was more important than her. For her, he could do anything.

And he did. He wagered his life to prove he was worthy of standing beside her.

At age twenty, he entered the military. The next three years of his youth were spent in the hell of wars. From a farmer's son with no wealth, strong background, or prior training, he created an name for himself.

Ouyang Jun became one of the six commanders of Shou.

For her, his persistence and determination burned like a roaring fire. All the blood, sweat, and tears he shed were the fuel to keep him going.

Nothing could be compared to her smile that awaited his return.

On the day of his victorious return, he raced through the capital in a hurry. The emperor offered generous rewards for his accomplishments, but none of it mattered. The first person he looked for was his beloved.

Over the hill, under the jasmine tree where their special place was, he stood waiting. His heartbeat drummed against his chest as her footsteps came closer with each second.

He wondered, he imagined, and he dreamed of this moment the very day he left three years ago. To think this day was finally coming true, it felt more unreal than his own imagination.

Her hand rested on his shoulder when she reached him. He whispered her name longingly at their first touch, "Yu'er."

Only he knew the thousands of times he called out her name. The thousands of times he cried out her name. Not a day passed by without thinking of her.

Before, he called out her name to himself. Today, she was finally here to hear it.

His strong arms craved to wrap around her waist, trapping her in his embrace and sharing the same warmth. Oh, how he wished to hold onto her and never let go.

"Jun," her voice spoke his name softly.

He could smell her sweet fragrance, but it was an unfamiliar scent.

She no longer smelled of jasmine flowers.

He started to turn around, to hold her into his arms so all these doubts would disappear. His hands shook with how much he desired to touch her and hear her say he was still the one she'd been waiting for. 

"Don't."

Ouyang Jun's hands dropped limply onto his sides. He pleaded for her permission, "Yu'er, please let me hold you."

"Jun, I..."

"I held myself back a thousand times. Each morning when I opened my eyes and each night before I closed my eyes, you were the first and last thought on my mind." His words were rushed as he tried to get all his feelings out. 

He wanted to shower her with his brimming love. He wished for her to welcome him in joy. "I told myself, I had to keep living no matter how hard it was because you were waiting for me. Yu'er, don't back away from me."

She took a step back then took a deep breath before finally revealing, "Jun, I'm a married woman."

Her words stabbed his heart like none other. His ears were lying, he refused to hear it... If he could, he would choose to close off his ears. 

Ouyang Jun's heart fell into the deep sea, the merciless angry waves squeezed his heart until it bled and the water turned into a deep red.

His beloved Yu'er... she was married?

Unable to accept it, he whirled around in a hurry despite her previous objection. "Song Qiuyue, don't play with me. It's cruel..."

"I... I am no longer the Yu'er you loved." Those words were the last words she said before running away.

This wasn't how things were supposed to go. Nothing was as the loving reunion that haunted his daydreams. He stood there frozen in shock, unable to process what she just said. And if she had taken just a moment to look at him, she would've noticed that his eyes were not the same as before...

On this day of their reunion, he couldn't see her. Even as she left him, he couldn't see her back fading farther and farther away. 

Hell, he couldn't even call out her name.

Even if he shouted, he knew she wouldn't come back. His Yu'er was long gone.

''Song Qiuyue,'' he whispered her name in silence. Don't walk away, I'm falling down. Don't walk away, I'm shattered. Come back and tell me it's not true. 

Tell me it's all lies. It has to be.

He wanted to chase after her, to grab her hand and lock her into his embrace so she couldn't escape. He wanted her to be his, just as it was before.

The dreams, plans, and promises he swore to himself--none of that mattered anymore. She was no longer his woman. Song Qiuyue was no longer his to cherish or treasure. He was no longer the man in her heart.

Yu'er, she belonged to another man now.

Ouyang Jun fell onto his knees, drowning in the depths of his sorrow and tears. The pain he overcame in that pit of hell hit his body all at once, like a thousand arrows shot with murderous intentions to take his life. His body fell onto the hard and cold ground. 

Motionlessly, he laid there. The sun rose to its highest point in the sky and the moon came up. Even when his heart was broken and his soul became empty, he couldn't bring himself to say one bad word of her.

He still wished for her to walk upon a path of flowers. He was afraid he wouldn't be able to bear seeing her in tears if the man she'd chosen did not treat her well. Song Qiuyue should only live happily. That was the least she could do for him.

Every year, when the last day of spring ended and the first day of summer began, he would think of her again. Under the jasmine tree with a bottle of wine, he mourned their lost love.

The yearning in his heart during three years of separation was for him to remember alone. The suffering he went through, she would never know.

The words of love he desperately wanted to whisper, she would never know.

The way he longed for her, the way he deeply loved her, the way he sacrificed his all for her, she would know none of it.

Each and every vow he made was only for him to know and remember. He would alone shoulder the weight remains of the love they once shared.

The ballad of his broken heart was to be untold until the end of time.