Bill Cipher One-Shots

🔞 Bill discovers tumblr 🔞

A tribute to the many wild and wacky things of Bill Cipher I found on tumblr. Some were bad, some were good, some were... well, not very nice for the human eye, and I decided to write about it. Enjoy.

"Y/NNNN..." Bill pokes you in the shoulder.  You ignored him. "What ya doinnngg?"

"I'm looking at tumblr posts. Why?" You answered. Bill looked confused. "Tom blur? What's a Tom blur?" He scratched his head, confused.

You sighed. "Tumblr issss..." you searched up 'what is tumblr' on google.  "Tumblr is a service that allows users to post multimedia and other content to a short-form blog. Users can follow other users' blogs. Bloggers can also make their blogs private." You read from the first thing that came up. 

"Huh?" Bill looked even more confused.

You groaned. "Basically it's like a site where people post art and stuff, talk to each other, and other stuff. Also, it's got porn on it, so beware of that."

"What's porn?" Bill asked, and you bit your tongue to stop from laughing.

"It's... uh... it's.. well, you find out for yourself." You snickered, then quickly got out of your chair and raced downstairs, waiting for Bill's reaction.

Bill sat in the chair and scrolled down the tumblr posts, unfortunately with the hashtag 'Bill Cipher'.

There was a post of him standing on a pile of skulls, looking very proud of himself. Bill chuckled, reminiscing when he nearly killed all humans on earth.

He scrolled further down, only to find some... very Intresting artwork.

He found a post titled 'Hot BillDip artwork for tonight 👌🏻😉' and Bill nearly gagged as he saw him and Dipper doing some... VERY INTRESTING STUFF on the bed.

Bill quickly scrolled down, but was met with more poisonous posts that made him want to throw up or smash the computer.

A post of him in a bra, one where Dipper was touching his... things, and more revolting garbage like that.

But then, Bill got to..

the porn.

And he screamed.

You nearly dropped your glass of water when you heard Bill's horrified screaming coming from upstairs. Bill usually laughed at ugly and gross things, so what he must have seen on there must have been awful.

You raced upstairs and found Bill hiding in the covers of your bed sheets, trembling. He screamed when you brought the computer up to his face. "GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME!" He dove under the covers.

You snickered. "So, uhh.. would you like me to set an account for you?" You asked.

"NO WAY! YOU'RE ONE OF THEM!" Bill yelled, and you put the computer down on your desk. "One of who?" You asked, confused.

"ONE OF THEM!" He replied.

"Ohhh, one of them." You nodded slowly, understanding it. There was an awkward moment of silence.

"Would you like some food?" You offered. Bill swallowed and came out of the covers. You shut the computer and walked downstairs. Bill came more reluctantly and slowly, almost if he was waiting for something to leap out at him.

Today had been a great day.

Well, here I am, finally writing another chapter! I need to apologise for not updating the oneshots book, I had things to do lol. Also, this whole thing was a joke, and I'm also fine with BillDip (Bill x Dipper), but I just don't ship it. Sorry 😐. Anyways, bye!