Finding Happiness [Wakatoshi Ushijima]

11. stop crying

"Goodnight, Wakatoshi-kun," I said through a lump in my throat. One moment I was standing in front of him, looking at his smiling face, then I was rushing through the entrance doors towards the bathroom. I vomited my dinner and sobbed for a good five minutes until a first year crawled under my stall and asked what was wrong.

Eto asked me what was wrong at least ten times. I didn't know what to tell her because I didn't know why I was so upset. Because I was confused? Because I felt like my heart betrayed me? Liking Wakatoshi was stupid, he wouldn't like me back- even if he did, his heart and time belonged to that damned volleyball. He was the exact opposite of Boton.

Thinking of Boton, my phone buzzed and his picture popped up. I wiped away my snotty nose and answered, "hello?"

"Akina-chan? Are you crying?" His voice came through worried.

"No just allergies-" I hiccuped.

"Bullshit," Eto whispered from the top bunk.

"Oh okay," and then he began to tell me how his afternoon went. He droned on until I was falling asleep.

After saying goodnight, I rubbed my eyes as I looked at my phone. I had a message from an unknown number.

-Akina-san, thank you for dinner tonight. If you don't mind working together on our assignment tomorrow during lunch, I'll bring a bento box for you. This is Wakatoshi Ushijima.

I smiled like an idiot at my phone.

-Didn't know you could cook so I'll be happy to try. Goodnight, Wakatoshi.

-Goodnight, Akina. Sleep well.

"I'm not the best cook," Wakatoshi told me as he came over to my desk after the lunch bell rang. He looked disappointed in himself. "My roommate made the eggs."

I smiled at the thought of him and Tendo making bento boxes together. I had warmed up to Tendo these past few months tutoring Wakatoshi. He used to wave every time he would see me after I raced Wakatoshi to the gym after our sessions. He also greeted me whenever I saw him in the hall. Boton was in the same class as him and told me he was odd but extremely smart.

"How domesticated of you," I accepted the box he handed me and stood to lead the way out of the classroom.

Boton was waiting outside like he did everyday. I squeezed his hand with my free hand.

"You brought lunch today?" He eyed the box and squeezed my hand back.

I smiled as I looked between him and Wakatoshi standing at my side, "Ushijima-san brought it to lighten my suffering. I'm helping him with an English assignment that I'm even struggling to finish."

Boton gave Wakatoshi a smile I saw right through. I knew Boton and he was easy to read. He wasn't happy. "Can we talk in private?" He tugged on my hand.

I looked up at Wakatoshi- he had his eyes pinned on Boton with his stoic gaze. "I'll meet you at our spot in a bit, okay?"

He gave me a nod without looking away from Boton and then walked away without a word.

Boton didn't let go of my hand as we walked to the Student Council Room. He silently led me in and closed the door behind us, letting go of my hand and remained gripping the door handles as he kept his head down.

"You know I don't mind that you're tutoring Ushijima-san." His voice was low and cold.

"I-" I took a step away from him.

"But you do know that tutoring happens after school in a classroom with people who signed up to be tutors."

"I know."

He turned around. His face was red with anger. I had only seen him this upset when my brother threatened to replace him for slacking with his duties. "I also don't mind that you rejoined the track team. I'm happy for you, but do you know the workload I'm taking on now? Your free time is sparse and instead of doing what you need as president, you're doing late night tutoring sessions with an idiot. We can't work together after school because you have practice but now you're abandoning your duties during lunch to run off with him."

I didn't know where to start. He popped a hole in my temper and I could feel my face and blood heating up. "Your workload increasement wasn't because you were picking up my slack. I just stopped doing your job. And do you know the workload I'm taking on if you ever cared to ask?" I always helped him out by taking some of his vice president assignments. He knew that. Now he's getting mad at me because I'm too busy to do his work? "And we never work during lunch! If I wasn't helping Ushijima, we'd be in here goofing off so don't make it sound like I'm abandoning my duties." I tried to catch my breath. I hated getting angry but Boton had pushed me. "And Wakatoshi is not an idiot!"

Boton flinched. I covered my mouth, not meaning to yell- we were still in school. I also had an example to set. I had got so worked up that tears swelled in my eyes. I hated that I would get so frustrated that I'd cry, it made me look weak. In reality, I was just angry.

Stop crying, I could hear my father screaming in my face. You're like a baby.

"I'm sorry," Boton whispered.

I didn't want him to apologize because of my watery eyes. I roughly wiped my eyes and pursed my lips as I made my decision. "I don't want to be in a relationship with you anymore."

"Akina," his voice cracked. His hands were suddenly on my cheeks and he lifted my face so that I was looking into his piercing eyes. "This was just a talk. You're upset." He kissed me softly. "I'm sorry I got angry with you."

A sob raked through me and I tried to look away but he held my face firmly. I wanted to get away. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize."

I finally pulled his hands away from my face. I was able to take a step back, "I'm sorry for ending things so quickly between us." I walked towards the door and held the bento box firmly to my chest. "I'll see you during free period. We'll work out how to balance your workload."