Kang, Hwang, Kang

23

He laid on his bed, unable to sleep. He didn't know if he should feel guilty or sad or anything at all after what had occurred earlier.

"I'm just dumping more and more of my emotions on you. It's not fair of me to do that when you're suffering too."

"Dongho."

"We should head to bed. We still have school tomorrow."

"Dongho, Minhyun does like you too. Even if you think-"

"It's alright, Baekho. If I have to share with you, then so be it. As long as I'm not being cast aside, I'll make sure Minhyun is happy. That's all I can do."

Baekho didn't know what else to say so he had let Dongho leave to his room. Normal? Baekho didn't think he was normal. He was always the outcast. He thought Dongho was normal but now he wasn't sure either. His thoughts felt scrambled up as he tried to seek answers to questions he hadn't had before. The more Dongho opened up about his own emotions, the more Baekho felt torn apart. It was as if he had also never looked his twin in the eyes, feel what he felt and cared about him. He sat up, unable to sleep as he groaned and ruffled his hair. Maybe Dongho was suffering just as much as him but he definitely hid it better. Baekho wore his expressions on his sleeve although he was less vocal about them and mostly use his hands to hide or turn away to avoid being exposed. He made his way to his window and pushed the curtains away. Minhyun's room was still lit and he texted the other.

'Still up studying?'

It only took a few seconds before he got a reply. 'Yep. Why are you up?'

'I can't sleep.'

'Something on your mind?'

Baekho didn't know if he should tell Minhyun about Dongho. He knew his twin always wanted to show Minhyun only the best sides of him but it was bound to hurt himself if he kept it up. At least if Minhyun knew... What could he do anyways?

'I guess.'

'Care to share?'

'Maybe not.'

'Okay then.'

Baekho didn't know what else to say. He was about to close his curtains and go back to bed when he saw Minhyun pushing his aside and opening the window. The student president leaned out and smiled, waving at Baekho who instantly lifted his window as well.

"Hey," Minhyun chirped. "Been awhile since we chat like this."

"Y-yeah..."

"Man, we used to do it all the time when you two still slept in the same room."

"We d-did."

"Is Dongho asleep already?"

Baekho shrugged and tried to peek over but he could see the window wasn't illuminated. "I think so."

"So... What happened?"

"Ah... Minhyun..." Baekho rubbed his neck and pursed his lips.

"Hmm?"

"Do you... I... Uh... To Dongho, what do you f-feel?"

"Why are you asking me so crypticly? Hmmm... What do I feel... How should I even put it?" Minhyun sighed and stretched his arms using the window sill. "Like? After our date, I can see him more than a friend but compared to you, I feel like he will always be there by my side so I didn't have to worry as much? Ah... Its a bit hard to explain."

"Eh? Are you saying... I'll leave?"

"No! That's not what I mean. Uh... Its just feels weird, you know. If he's not by me even though he always is, I feel uncomfortable and uneasy as if I don't have someone to fall back to."