I hadn't heard from H in over two days and I was getting lonely. I don't want to be one of those people that rely on guys to make them shoot but he's just disappeared and my mood keeps getting worse. Maybe I did something wrong, but we hadn't even met properly. Oh my god what if he was waiting for me to make the first move and now he think I don't like him? No that can't be the case because I've been texting him. Well either way I have to move on with my day, I have no other choice.
Through out my whole day, I couldn't stop thinking about him, imagining his gorgeous green eyes that I'm yet to see. They guys I coached today all wondered what had happened since I had been happy recently. Today was the worst, it went super slow and I missed Li. He said he couldn't hang today because someone was moving into his flat, I didn't know who this person was but Li seemed to be really excited. If I'm honest I felt slightly left out. I couldn't wait to get home and just be alone. That was how I dealt with my problems now, I just sat alone with music playing and crying. It worked pretty well in my opinion.
That was exactly what I did tonight. I got home around 9pm, H normally cane back around 11pm except the past few days where I never heard him at all. I swear his door never moved, sometimes I thought he had moved out but I don't know, maybe I'll never know. Oh how he has messed up my life.
I loved my flat but it was so lonely, what if I got a roommate like Liam, nope I couldn't deal with another person. I don't even have another bedroom and I only share my bed with my best mate or my boyfriend, I do had one that is. I was hoping H would become one but it feels like that idea is out the window. I wish I was braver maybe it could have happened then.
I had that song playing on repeat again, it felt so real to me and by the end of the second play I was in tears. It was so deep and relatable, I love it. I hate to admit but soon enough I was violently sobbing, all my pain falling down my cheeks. I felt my emotions float out of my body and I started to feel better.
But then instead of a new tear, I let out a frightened scream...
~~~~~~
Kinda short but the next one will be good.
