explosion (jay halstead / one chicago)

chapter 19

liz's pov

Once we got back to the station, Erin took me to the locker room where she handed me make-up wipes so I could brush away the dark stains on my cheeks. Jay's partner sat behind me, silently watching as I splashed water in my face. "We only just met," she started. "But I want you to know that I mean it when I say you did amazing today." She hesitated for a moment. "It must have been very hard for you," she then added empathetically. Turning around and leaning against the sink, I nodded. "Thanks."

Erin flashed me a smile before she continued. "Jay is a great guy. He cares a lot about you and he always wants to be there and help. I know it can be hard sometimes when people around you try everything and yet they'll never be able to understand what exactly you've been through." Our eyes met as I felt a stinging sensation in my heart. She was right. Of course, it helped to talk, and it helped to know someone was around. But while it made the pain a bit more bearable, it could never fully take it away. Erin got up. "I know we haven't been through the same, and the things I experienced are different to those you experienced. But if you ever want someone to listen and maybe understand the slightest bit – I'm here, okay? Just give me a call."

I felt tears dwelling up in my eyes. All the people I met here in Chicago were so nice to me, and I didn't know how on earth I deserved it. "Thanks, that means a lot." I wiped away a single tear that was threatening to fall from the corner of my eye. Erin stepped forward and hugged me tightly. When we pulled away, I smiled at her. "Let's go upstairs and see what the boys are up to," she said half serious, half joking.

Once in the unit's office, Voight came up to me. "You did great out there, Severide. One of our own couldn't have done it better." I was surprised at the praise, but I took it gratefully. The Sergeant motioned towards the break room. "Someone's waiting for you."

Walking into the small area, I smiled at my brother Kelly. He was wearing his work shirt and radio, meaning that he was still on duty. He got up when he saw me. "Sylvie said you had some undercover thing going, that someone from Madrid showed up. I came as fast as I could. Is it Vince?" I couldn't do much more than nod before he pulled me into a hug. Up until this morning, my brother had been the only one in Chicago besides Jay who knew details about my life in Madrid, and the only one to have known from the beginning. Now, Sylvie as well as half of the police department knew. Still, Kelly was the only one who had heard the full truth about my past. I enjoyed being close to him. Since we didn't live together anymore, we mostly saw each other at work or at Molly's, and I missed having him around.

After we let go, I closed the door in order to give both us and Intelligence some privacy. My brother watched as I poured myself a glass of water and leaned against the counter. He smiled. "See, that's what you get from fucking a cop. You're undercover before you even have a chance to tell your roommate or brother you're not coming to work." I knew he was trying to lighten the mood. "I don't even wanna know how that came about," Kelly continued. I laughed. His attempt was working. "Not in any way like you think." I rolled my eyes at him and sat down on the sofa. My brother smirked. "Well, last time I remember seeing you with this guy, you were making out hard at your apartment. So please spare me with details."

jay's pov

"What do you think they're talking about?" Adam positioned his hands on my desk and leaned forward, nodding his head towards Liz and Kelly in the break room. I shrugged. "I have no idea, but it seems to be cheering her up. That's all that matters." Adam smirked. "Bet there's a lot more ways that you could cheer her up, Halstead." He winked at me. I rolled my eyes. "You know, not everything's about sex." At hearing the last word, Kevin looked up from his paperwork. Obviously, he had been listening. He turned towards me. "Don't tell me it wasn't all you thought about when you saw her in that outfit." I shrugged. It was true, Liz's undercover outfit left little to imagination while giving a whole bunch of motives for dirty fantasies. But at the same time, I had been more worried about her meeting her asshole ex than anything else.