Yowzah Oneshot Collection (2)

78(M)

I've Got Something That You're Gonna Like

                     leiascully

It's never difficult to find River. The Doctor just gives the TARDIS her head and away they go. She's been missing River a lot lately; it's been weeks since she dropped River off at the university.

"I've got work to do, sweetie," River had said, kissing her on the cheek. "Go and flummox the universe for a bit. I'll see you in a little while." No amount of sulking would keep her in the TARDIS. So off the Doctor went to see what taking on the universe was like for a Time Lady, which was interesting for a while, but this is as long a little while as she's willing to tolerate. Just for starters, she's gotten used to the benefits of being married to a sexually-liberated individual, and though she's learned to manage all right on her own, it isn't the same without River. It's taken her a thousand years just to admit that, yes, all right, she might possibly enjoy sex just a little bit or possibly rather a lot and it might even contribute to her mental and physical health et cetera, and she thinks River ought to acknowledge that fairly Herculean effort of self-discovery by being around when the Doctor wants her. And the Doctor wants her, today.

Fortunately, the TARDIS is more than pleased to take the Doctor where she needs to go. She land with a self-satisfied little noise and the Doctor pets the console before going out the door. Her hair's gotten longer and she has to push it out of her face to take a proper look around. She scrapes her rather rebellious ginger locks into a rough ponytail and gazes about. She's on some planet so remote it barely has a name - its people were numerous and prolific in terms of their architecture, but they didn't communicate much with the outside worlds, until they were conquered. The whole place is ruins and blasted-to-sand desert. Bit depressing, really, except that there, striding through the rubble, is River. She looks absolutely magnificent in jodhpurs and a tanktop, her hair pulled back and her skin smudged with dirt. The Doctor waves and River catches it and changes direction, advancing swiftly toward the TARDIS.

"Hello, sweetie," she says, looping her arms around the Doctor's waist and giving the Doctor a kiss that ends far too soon to sate the Doctor's appetite. "Come and see my site - we're finding the most wonderful things. I've got some decent students this round."

"I will never understand why you do this when you could just pop in and say, 'Oh, hello, just wondering about this bit - was it a spoon or a flange? And by the by, that recurring motif of the thing with the fangs, a god or a performance artist?'" the Doctor grumbles. River takes her hand with an air of indulgence.

"Where's the fun in that?" River asks. "Much more interesting to deduce it. Mind you, I do have the occasional inspired insight - my students are all convinced I'm simply brilliant."

"Well, you are," the Doctor says. "Which is why all of this is a mystery. You might as well be Vincent Van Gogh trying to barter photobooth caricatures for pastis. You've got real talent and real insight."

"Hush," River says. "Come and see." She leads the Doctor on a tour of the ruins, pointing out each feature as if neither of them have ever seen ruins before. It seems like an age before they're finally at River's tent. River ushers the Doctor inside.

"Temporary quarters," she says, pumping water into a dish to wash her hands and splash her face. "Still, comfortable enough." She motions to the platform bed, which is essentially a box with an air mattress on it and a rail headboard she's been using to hang clothes over, and offers the Doctor iced tea from a cooler. The Doctor sips at it. Tea should be hot - she feels this very strongly - but at least this chilled stuff clears some of the dust from her throat. River lounges in a camp chair. She leans forward and gazes at the Doctor.