crown [t. oikawa]

[three]

[ a/n ugh the gifs aren't working for some reason,,, bear with me please ] 

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GOKANA AND I ARE GOOD AT PRETENDING.

it's been a month after that incident on the rooftop, and we continue to pretend that everything is fine with our friendship. we have pretended that we never had that argument that slowly started to burn up our friendship.

i have begun to realize that our friendship is weak, only held together by the several years we've known each other. 

[but of course, i pretend not to know that. and i know she does the same.]

we are both extremely good at pretending and lying to ourselves and each other. perhaps we've been doing it so often lately that it's become second nature. i lie to her and says that the darkness is my crown. she lies to me and says that i'm her best friend. 

we are spinning and crafting an endless web of lies that we will eventually be caged in.

[but of course, we pretend not to know that.]

so that's why, on gokana's birthday today, i am heading home instead of heading to her massive birthday bash, on the excuse that i don't like crowded places. i was planning to go to fukurodani's volleyball practice to watch akaashi and bokuto and talk to kaori and yukie, but those four apparently ditched practice for the party (i assume bokuto dragged akaashi to go). 

i glance up, tearing my eyes away from the pavement on the floor and instead looking at the big house down the corner, bursting with people and laughter. before i can decide how i feel about this, my phone vibrates.

a ghost of a smile rests on my lips as i pick up the phone. while my friendship with gokana has begun to fade over the past month, my friendship with the mysterious caller has done the opposite.

but even though he's the person i've been talking to the most in the past month, i still do not know his name. not even the sport which he loves so much. yet i know his deepest fears, his desperate hope and his determination. 

it is the same with me. he doesn't know my name, my school or anything about me. and unlike how i know about his troubles, he does not know about mine. 

[i don't want to burden him with them.]

he's the first person in a while who actually wants me to talk to them, and i...i don't want him to leave me alone like gokana did because of the darkness. 

"hello? kichona?"

i frown, realizing that it was not the mysterious person who had called. "hajime?"

"yeah, it's me," hajime says. "try not to sound too disappointed."

my mouth twitches into a slight smile and i push open the gate to my house, entering into my garden with blooming flowers that seem so fragile that if i touched them, they would fade away. "anyways, why'd you call? aren't you supposed to be at volleyball practice right now?"