skinny love | shyland

seven

ryland's pov

somehow, without either of us even realising, my first week of working at flakefleet records had been and gone, my daily journey to work becoming muscle memory within a mere few days. wake up at seven, drop madison off at school, pass through the starbucks drive-thru to get myself an iced latte — and usually go back round a second time when shane has claimed he'd just woken up and venmo-ed me enough money to buy him one and keep the change — before heading into work.

our meeting with the 1975 had gone excellently last monday, which shane had credited to how organised i'd made him appear when in reality he was still stubbing out the end of his cigarette when we heard their voices from down the hall. he'd been frantically fiddling with his tie as we walked back inside, to which i stopped him and reassured him that we were meeting with a band notoriously known for being stoned and making music about having sex in cars. they weren't going to judge how smart he looked. but still, i had stood on my tiptoes and tightened his tie whilst he stared directly into my eyes and made my stomach flip over.

that was the night i had gone home and promised myself that i wouldn't let him look at me like that anymore – or rather i wouldn't blush when he did so, because i couldn't really control the way his eyes focus on me for a little too long. so there was that, and then the pet names; i would bring him up on those going forward and remind him that i was getting married this year.

they were good promises to myself up until he had texted me that night to congratulate me again on how well i'd handled the interview, ending the message with 'well done, seems like you're not just a pretty face' and making me reread the ten words several times over. then the teenage nostalgia would flood back.

things with conor hadn't really gotten better, but at the same time they hadn't gotten any worse. he still kissed my cheek instead of my lips when i walked through the door, and we still fought over the fact that he had no career and did a pathetic job at looking after his own daughter at the best of times, just placing her in front of the tv, but we were okay. we had to be okay. we were getting married within a year, and i hadn't realised how deep the wound between the two of us was until it was yanked away without a second thought.

madison had felt sick this morning so i'd made the decision to allow her to stay home from school, telling conor to keep her hydrated and not to leave her alone for too long. you'd think this would be second nature when looking after a five year old, but i always felt like i had to make even the simplest of things clear.

i took the sharp left turn towards the starbucks near the office and glanced down at the cuffs of my sleeves. i'd chosen to wear the tan coloured giorgio armani suit set i'd gotten two weeks ago, and despite the fact that it was a slightly different fit to the other four i'd been bought, being in expensive clothes felt good. perhaps it was because it gave you a little confidence boost, particularly when you're walking down the streets of la and everyone is trying to outdo each other by acting as busy and as important as possible, the bigger the sunglasses the better.

the light blue shirt i wore underneath pressed against my wrists as i tapped my finger on the steering wheel, groaning at the queue of cars with a huff before concentrating on the path in front of me. monday mornings were always the worst when it came to this drive-thru, everyone thinking that a cheap shot of coffee would be what swayed the inconsequential beginning of the week into a motivating chapter from a self help book. i pulled up to the drive-thru speaker and checked my phone, hoping that shane had awoken a little earlier than he had last week and would of texted me what he wanted by now. at least that way i would avoid greeting the staff in starbucks for a second time l time.

luckily i has just one message, asking for some kind of light-ice matcha drink with caramel in that i felt extremely embarrassed ordering and paying for alongside my standard iced coffee. a gif popped up after of a smiling hamster and i rolled my eyes, turning to the employee and swiping my card on the machine.