I knock on a door, this door should be where I'm having therapy.
Whooo.
Not.
"Private Martinez" a woman, around her thirty's says opening the door
"I'm Captain Lousia Lewis, I'm a clinical psychologist" she says adjusting her army uniform
"Come in" she says and I follow her inside of her office.
It's an open planned office with one wall which is all window, giving me a view onto the city below.
"Would you like something to drink?" She asks me
"No thank you ma'am" I say
"I think we can leave it with the formalities don't you?" She asks and I nod
"Take a seat" she says and I sit i front of her desk.
"I'm here to look after your best interests" she tells me and I nod
"How's life treating you Eden?"
"Fine" i say
"We all know that it's not the easiest to adjust after a tour"she says and i nod
Everyone keeps saying that.
"I take it that you've been told why your here today?" She asks me
"I uh, was in a hostage situation and they think that I need a long medical break" I tell her
"You recently lost a member of your platoon" she says and i nod
"Sargent Jones" i say, "we were in the hostage situation together"
"That must have been difficult" she says
"Yeah it was" I say and I see her look up at me from the papers on her desk at the corner of my eye.
"She was like a sister to me, we served two nine month tours together" I say
"That's a lot to process for anyone" she says
"You just throw yourself back in your work you know? Well in this case, I can't" i say
"Would you say that your good at compartmentalising you're feelings?" She asks me
"What does that mean?" I ask her
"It's a way some people cope with trauma, you put things to the back of your mind until you want to deal with them" she says
"Yeah, I guess"
"The only problem is that you can only keep a certain amount of those feelings locked away and only for a certain amount of time" she says
"Tell me about Ethan Connolly" she says
I tense, "what about him?"
"Well I see here that he rescued you, and that you are currently going to school together" she says
"Yeah well we met on my first tour actually, we have a jokey relationship. It's very light hearted. He helped me get through a lot after losing Kaylee and other people along the way. We met on my first tour actually, we were both new to the platoon and we kind of bonded over that" I tell her
"Would you say it's a romantic relationship?" She asks me
I shake my head, "no it was like a comfort, rebound situation where he was just a good friend"
"But... uh he just buries his feelings as well and we'd just get on with it" i say
"That's not the best thing to do though" she says
"It's the way I've been brought up" I say
"Is that why you chose not to take leave after losing Connor?" She asks me
"How do you know about Connor?" I ask her
"It has it here that you saw him die, in Afghanistan in January this year" she tells me
"I didn't think I needed to take leave" I say
"Even though he was your cousin?" She asks me and i nod
"But still it must have been difficult going back to Afghanistan, must have brought back up a lot of memories for you" she says
"I'm here to do a job" I tell her, "I don't let distractions get the better of me"
"Right" she says and I look down
"They think I have PTSD don't they?" I ask her
"Not necessarily" she tells me and i nod
"I see your a dog handler" she says
"Yes he's my best friend" I say and she smiles
"Speaking of which" I begin and she looks up, "they gave Max to someone else"
"I can make a request and get him back to you?" She suggests, "but there is no guarantees"
"Okay, thank you" i say standing up
"You know, I've never had a dog" she says and i nod
"Well maybe you should" i say
"Just a question" she says and I turn around
"If the dog finds a bomb what do you do?" She asks me
"Well I mark it out, and then the bomb diffuser on the squad with come and deal with it. I make sure that it's safe for us to carry on" i say
"And why do you do that?" She asks me and I look down
She's making me learn a lesson.
"Because if not it could go off and any moment, anything could trigger it and the longer I leave it the more me or anyone around me are at risk of getting injured" I say
"It's like grief, treat it, deal with it and you are then able to heal" she says, "but leave it untouched, it can do some real damage"
"Ma'am" i say before leaving her room.
YOU ARE READING
Last Duty
ActionEden Martinez. Much more than your ordinary eighteen year old girl. At the end of her sophomore year she dropped out of college to join the army, and it was the best decision of her life. Yes it meant that she had to mature quickly, yes that meant...
