PINK FEATHER BOAS AND CIGARETTES

5

Another night at Poison.

The usual crowd gathered, and Frank killed it as usual. And as usual, Gerard tried not to be too obvious and stare at him and how he could see his crotch through the lingerie. But Frank noticed, and winked at him.

And when Gerard finished his shift, Frank was outside waiting for him. 'You wanna stay over at my place?' he asked, and Gerard answered by pulling him to a corner where no one would see them, and kissed him.

Back at Frank's apartment, clothes were off as soon as they entered his bedroom, and Gerard was surprised he was still wearing the lingerie under his jeans. 'Surprise!' Frank moaned already hard.

The next second, they were making out, Gerard on top of Frank, jerking him off, without taking off his panties.

Not long after, Gerard was fucking him from behind, pulling his hair. Frank liked that their relationship turned into this.

Though they still went out for dates, and Gerard convinced him to read comic books, which Frank genuinely loved. And Gerard would spend more and more time at Frank's apartment. Just doing nothing. Jamia would sometimes join them to watch a movie.

Afternoons sitting on Gerard's lap making up stories.

Frank never thought this was possible.

He didn't think someone like Gerard existed, and he felt the luckiest motherfucker alive being the one he loved.

'You guys are so adorable, it's disgusting,' Jamia said and walked out, going off to work.

And though they tried to hide it at work, sometimes it was impossible not to look at each other in the middle of Frank's set, or steal kisses while taking a smoke break outside.

They had been lucky no one had seen them.

Until –

Frank's boss, the owner of Poison saw them leaving together one night, holding hands.

He waited until the following day, and as soon as Frank arrived, he was called to the boss' office. 'You wanted to see me?' Frank asked. He wasn't even nervous. He had no idea they had been caught.

'Sit down.' Mr. Dewees was strict, and Frank was sure he had no heart. He was lucky his instructor got him the job back then, and that apparently he made them a lot of money, otherwise, he wouldn't be there. 'Can you explain to me what were you doing with that bartender kid?'

Frank didn't know what to say. There was no point in denying it. If he was asking, he saw them.
But the last thing he wanted was to get Gerard in trouble. And he didn't know exactly what he meant. It could have been just a look, or a kiss.

'I saw you leaving together last night. And it's not the first time someone witness you being too close.'

Frank just nodded.

'You know it's strictly prohibited for employees to be involved with each other, especially our performers.' For a second Frank thought about getting Gerard another job so they could be together, but he knew that was selfish of him. And it was too late now.

If he was fired, he had no choice but to accept his fate.

'I'll give you two options,' Mr. Dewees said. 'Either I fire him, or you get demoted from your position, and go back to main floor.' Frank hated that. The only thing he liked about his job was performing. But everyone started on main floor, one of many dancers, up on a pedestal, with barely enough room to go around the pole. And men always got to close and touched him. The thought made his skin crawl. But he didn't want Gerard to lose his job.

'I'll go back to main floor,' Frank said.

'I knew you'd say that. You start tonight.'

With losing his position as the star, he also lost his private dressing room. He shared a tiny room with two other strippers, who looked surprised to see him there.

He just wished he had had a drink, because he wasn't sure he could do it sober.

He changed into the uniform – red panties and boots – and walked to the main floor. One of the security guards told him to take the pole at the very end, which he was thankful for because then Gerard wouldn't see him.

Soon, he was surrounded by men, all just as disgusting, trying to grab his legs and back. They didn't even give good tips.

Frank tried to focus on the song playing.

They always told me that
"You never get to heaven"
With a love like yours
Well if you're lost little boy
The cameras pull you right back down, yeah
It's like a chemical burn

He tried to tune out the rest, and just dance for himself, even though he didn't have enough space to move around.

A few customers offered him drinks, which he gladly took, because he needed it.

Five hours later, he went home, with not even half the tips he usually made, and didn't even wait for Gerard.

He got a text from him, asking what had happened. I'm not feeling well, he replied after a while.

The next day, Frank didn't even bother to call or text Gerard, nor the following day. The following Friday, he got a request for a private. He wasn't Destroya anymore, he couldn't say no. He had no choice but to go with the old man.

At least he was drunk enough.

On his way back, Gerard saw him, but Frank avoided him. He didn't know how to explain that he was having the worst time of his life because they had been caught.

Frank wanted nothing more than to hug Gerard again and spending the night with him, instead of those men. But he didn't dare to tell him what was happening.

The next day, he had two privates. He had completely forgotten how awful it felt.

He walked home, crying, wishing he could find another job so he could quit before his next shift. And just as he walked up to the door to his building, he noticed Gerard was waiting outside. 'I just wanna know what's –,' Gerard saying, but stopped when he noticed Frank was crying. 'What's wrong?'

He couldn't tell him. He just couldn't. He knew he'd be disappointed in him. 'I'm just – can you stay with me tonight?' he asked, and buried himself in Gerard's arms.