𝐌𝐀𝐃 𝐖𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍 ─── a songfic

ɪɪɪ

❛ or does she mouth 'fuck you' forever ❜

✦

he was still beautiful.

his bright eyes. his crooked grin. his dark hair.

beautiful, she thought, he was beautiful, and she hated it, hated how she still thought of him that way, hated his perfect smile, hated it hated it hated it  h a t e d  i t .

✦

she remembered the first time he'd spoken to her.

you know, he'd said, there's a party later tonight. you should come.

and of course, of course she'd fallen for it, how could she say no to that face ? so endearing, so charming, so perfect. even when she'd heard his friends' laughter in the background and knew it was just a stupid dare – ask her out, man, come on, don't be a pussy – she'd still said yes, because how could she say no, how could anyone say no.

and it was at that party, that dizzying and loud and spectacular party, that he'd kissed her under the spinning stars, and that was it – that was it, when she knew with a startling and strangely beautiful certainty that she loved him. maybe she'd always loved him, catching glimpses of him when she could, ever since the second grade.

she still loved him, even now.

even now, but she was crazy, crazy, crazy, she was mad, mad, mad.

and mad people couldn't love.

or at least that's what they thought, what they said – but she knew. she knew the truth.

she was crazy, crazy, crazy ; crazy in love, mad with love.

mad, so mad with love . . .