𝙒𝙝𝙮 𝙃𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙎𝙥𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙔𝙤𝙪 𝘾𝙖𝙣 𝙃𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙚𝙧?

Chapter 17

My heart has not calmed down since I left the Main House. Even though Akito is now behind me, my heart is excited to see Hatori again. But my head is in so much pain because I am so scared. The thought of failing, of not having the strength to say anything to him, looms over me. 

"Natsu, you're leaving again? But you only got home!" Mom quivers as I stand in front of the mirror in our foyer. I try to fix my part, which was ruined by the hairdresser that my mom had even my hair out. 

"I have my phone with me, Mom." I groan, licking my finger and pressing down some hair.

"Tell me where you're going so that if you don't pick up your phone, I can call and make sure you're alive." She continues to fret.

"Mother, I will be fine. I'm an adult." I remind her.

"Oh, be safe Natsu." I walk over to my shoes and begin to unlace them. "I just don't want you to overexert yourself."

"I know. I know."

I decide to take a detour to get to Hatori's house. I just need to collect myself before I go and speak to him. 

As soon as I arrive at my usual spot, the deer make a b-line to me, and start nudging their noses into me. "I guess even with the curse you guys won't leave me alone." I sigh, pulling out a baggie of deer feed. "Hang on, hang on."

At least one part of my life hasn't changed. I might spend my whole life until I'm dead feeding the deer one day every week. It's almost romantic, and sad. That the only thing that doesn't change is me feeding the creatures that first came to me because of the curse. 

"Hey, wait a minute, where is Aya?" I ask looking over the group of deer I am so familiar with. I know each of them by name, and marking. And so I noticed when the shy female is missing. I survey the hillside and spot not to far off in the briars, the deer stands with her new fawn.

"Don't trust me? Huh?" I smirk. "More for the others!"

"Natsu?" The whole world seems to freeze hearing His voice. I know the exact way he says it. How the word moves out of his mouth into the air. And I didn't expect him hear.

"Ha.. Hatori!" I quickly pull myself together and turn to face him. He's not wearing a suit today. Just a button up. He looks almost painful to look at. His face looks so worn out, he must be doing a lot of work recently. "I.... uh... didn't expect to see you here."

"It's been sometime since I've seen you." He comments. "You look well."

"Oh, uh, thank you." My right hand moves up and covers the place where a bruise is still showing. Say something, gosh darn it. Why is this so hard? I just want to tell him how I feel. Why is this so difficult.

"No. I don't have anything for you." Hatori says as Suga, the stag of the group of deer, sniffs as his pants. 

"Here." I take Hatori's hand, and place some of the feed in it. "If you're going to be here, you might as well put yourself to use."

"Oh, uh, okay." He looks so confused by this. Which is honestly so adorable.

"So, what brings you by here? Not many people come here." I ask stroking Suga's head.

"Uh, I just needed to get some fresh air." He awkwardly says. Stop being so adorable Hatori! It's not fair. 

"Oh yeah? Is work crazy right now?" 

"Yeah, uh, kinda." SAY SOMETHING NATSU! STOP DRAGGING YOUR FEET! WHY IS THIS SO HARD!

"Hatori.... I need to apologize to you." I quickly say. "I meant to tell you at the hospital... but.... I uh, I fell asleep."

"Natsu... you..."

"Don't try and act like the nice guy and say there's nothing I need to apologize for. You don't have to lie anymore." I cut him off. "I know that I took advantage of the curse way too much. And I shouldn't have. I saw so many times the curse and our "bond" caused you pain. I never did anything about it, I never said anything about it. And I was sometimes happy about it."

"You shouldn't have had to go through all that you did. I should have been fighting from the beginning. From the first day I was aware of the pain I caused you. Because..." I bit my lip trying to hold back tears. "Because if I really loved you... I would have fought for your freedom!"

He stands shell shocked at my statement. My heart beats against my ribcage, trying to break free. My whole body is glue to the ground. My throat hurts as if the words I needed to say were poison. My cheeks are red and hot. I feel ashamed about the fact that I had so little strength to tell him this. To tell him what I've felt. 

I cry into my hands, avoiding his eyes. Avoiding the harsh words that might come because, I, an adult, am crying like a child. 

"Natsu... I..." He begins to talk, but then stops. "Natsu, if you have to apologize to me, then I have to do the same to you. I've been to cruel to you and your feelings for the longest of times, I've blamed you for something you couldn't control. Thank you."

"Thank... you?" He pulls a handkerchief  out of my pocket and hands it to me. 

"You've fought for me, and noticed that you were in the wrong before I did. You were willing to go up against Akito to free me." He smiles. "I don't deserve you're love."

I try to hide my surprise at his words. Why would he apologize to me..... Then my mind goes back to Akito. How we spoke to each other about the things we've failed to do. Promises the two of us both failed to keep. How I was in the wrong, just like she was. Hatori and I, have both had our faults. We've both said and done things we shouldn't have done. 

"Hatori, the two of us have done a lot wrong. We've both done wrong. The best now, would just be for us to put are differences aside, and start things anew." I put myself together, and realize just how happy I am. I've been given a chance to start anew with the person I love. I have been given a chance many don't get. 

"Thank you." He looks up at the late afternoon sky. "This is something I could've only dreamed of Natsu. They have always been right about you."

"You have always been like a warm and excepting summer."

Natsu, summer. I have always been known for bringing out the best in people. Just like summer warms people. 

Before I know it, he wraps me up in a hug and press his face against my cheek. My mind is unraveling trying to process everything. The smell of his cologne and of summer sweat is making my heart flutter. The fact that his soft lips are right on my bruised cheek. All of this is better than I ever imagined. And all of this feels so unreal. Like I'm dreaming. I must be.... there's no way any of this could be going so smoothly. But, I can feel everything around me, and I smell everything and understand all of the pain and love that is running through my body.

"Tell me this is real, that, that I'm not dreaming." I whisper to Hatori.

"This is real." He moves his face so that we're staring into each other's eyes. I turn red and burry my face. This is kinda embarrassing to me for some reason, I feel like I'm being watched, and not by the deer. 

"Why don't the two of you just go ahead and kiss already." I hear Shigure say. Hatori's hands tighten around my back as we see him coming up the path. 

"I don't know what goes on in that gross mind of yours that you would come to the conclusion." Hatori lies, throwing me a quick smirk.

"I might not have the best mind out there, but I do know some things. And the two of you have by this point practically professed your undying love to each other." Shigure laughs. 

"Yeah, Shigure, you need your head checked." I say. I feel my phone buzz in my pocket. It's probably Mom. So I just ignore it. 

"What are you doing here anyway?" Hatori asks.

"I thought I'd take the scenic route on my way out of the estate. And boy, did I get a scene." Shigure replies looking straight at me.