Stand By Me

Chapter Sixteen

Harry knows that they're all waiting for Niall to break. Dad and Papa have signed the papers to keep him in their care permanently but there's no big celebration. Niall puts on an act of cheeriness, he smiles and he talks like there's been no change, but they all know him well enough to see right through it.

The entire atmosphere of the house has changed and it's causing Harry's anxiety to play up; and he knows that if it feels bad for him then it must be atrocious for Niall. His mother died; not only died, she killed herself. Harry doesn't know how he'd cope if ever anything happened to Dad or Papa, and whilst he knows that Niall's Mum wasn't very good to him, it's clear that the other boy doesn't know how to cope either.

So he's pretending, clearly. He doesn't speak about her, doesn't speak about anything of importance. He goes about the rest of the weekend and then the first few days of the following week as if the police never came around and tore his entire world down, but Harry knows better.

He hears Niall wake up in the middle of every night, hears him creep down the stairs and stay there until the sun rises, he sees how the smiles don't reach his eyes and his voice remains flat beneath the fake happiness.

He sees all the cracks that shatter through the mask that he wears, because they're brothers and they know each other all too well — even better now that they've been living with each other for a while.

The dam doesn't break until they're in English class on Thursday. Everything is normal, calm and quiet; Ms Clarke goes over the reading at the front of the class, outlining the structure of a good essay, and there's really no need for Harry to suspect that this is going to be the moment that it happens, the moment they've been waiting for for the past five days. The grand showdown, the closing of the curtains.

So it comes as a surprise when his eyes wander from the front of the room to glance at Niall in the chair beside him only to find that his shoulders are shaking up and down, his head bowed down and one hand cupped above his brows to hide his face as silent tears stream down his cheeks.

Harry's heart thuds, a mix of anxiety and sympathy coursing through him as he lets out a small breath and settles a hand on his best friend's, his brother's, back. He turns back to the front, trying to catch the teachers eye just as she, thankfully, throws a concerned gaze in their direction.

"So, what I want you to do is just discuss the best way to structure an introduction and opening paragraph with the person beside you and then I'll be asking for feedback," she says, tugging her eyes away from the crying boy on the front desk and clapping her hands together.

She waits a moment for everyone to begin talking amongst themselves before subtly heading over to their table, resting her elbows on it as she crouches in front of them. Harry rubs his hand up and down the smaller boys back as he shakes with tears, his own eyes misting over in empathy.

"Can I take him to the office? I think he should go home," he says softly, and Ms Clarke presses her lips together, reaching across the desk to rub the top of Niall's arm softly.

"Do you want to grab your things, angel? I think your brother's right," she says gently, and Niall keeps his head ducked down as he nods, silently closing his book and reaching under the desk for his backpack, crying so quietly that Harry doubts he would know if the tears weren't there and his entire body wasn't trembling.

He stands alongside him and holds his bag for him, hooking it over one arm and keeping his other hand on Niall's back as he leads him out of the room with a murmured 'thanks' to the understanding teacher, only speaking once they're out in the hall.

He peers at his brother, who still hasn't lifted his head, making small sniffling sounds now that there's nobody else around to hear. "Ni," he murmurs, rubbing his back again. "I'm so sorry." It's all he can think to say, voice cracking on the last syllable as his eyes prick with his own tears.