distance🖤 - mattia polibio

"good to know"

TIME SKIP - IDFK WHERE WE ARE BUT LET'S JUST SAY IT'S BEEN LIKE 4 MONTHS AND IT'S NOW VALENTINE'S DAY - OUR 3 YEAR ANNIVERSARY - YES I MISSED A YEAR JUST GO WITH IT PLS- 

THIRD PERSON POV OF TIME SKIP- y/n has been loving her job , she's always excited to go in and do what she loves. mattia's proud of her , he really is , but it's been bothering him that he feels like he barely spends time with his girlfriend anymore. he hasn't bought it up because he doesn't wanna make her feel bad. everytime she gets called in unexpectedly he forces himself to not be selfish and just be happy for her. it's basically been months of  her enjoying her new job and him being supportive and just dealing with it. but today was their anniversary of three years and he was so excited to finally spend time with her. 

"hey sweaty" i smiled as mattia came home from practice and i walked over to him.

"hey baby" he smiled and pulled me into a hug.

we pulled away from the hug and he was smiling so much and so was i. 

"happy three years" we both said at the same time and we laughed and leaned in for a slow kiss.

"i need to shower , then i need to go to the store and get some stuff and i'll be back in an hour okay" he said and i nodded.

while he showered , i changed into some jeans and tshirt and played with lynx for a bit before mattia gave me a kiss and then left to get whatever he needed to get. i smiled to myself as i just scrolled through tiktok for a bit.  three years of us. i was excited to catch up with him today. 

after an hour , at like 5pm he came home and he had no bags in his hand.

"where's the stuff you bought" i laughed.

"in the car , we'll need it later" he smiled and i kissed him and we sat on the sofa together and it felt like the first time in ages since we'd even sat together properly.  

we watched lynx try to chase this toy we'd bought him and it made us laugh because he kept going the wrong way. 

"so , i was thinking later-" he started saying.

and then my phone rang.

we both looked at the contact name and his face fell as i answered it.

"why not tomorrow?" i asked lewis and mattia closed his eyes and laid his back on the sofa. 

"bye" i said to lewis and hung up and mattia looked at me. 

"you're joking right" he said.

"we can't move it to tomorrow , they need to pick it up tomorrow" i sighed.

"so you're leaving again?" he asked.

"we can celebrate tomorrow instead?" 

"but you'll get called in tomorrow too. and the day after and the day after that" 

"it's not my fault mattia , if no one else is there then i have to go in" 

"i know it's not your fault but i'm sure you can say no once in a while too. you're not obliged to go in whenever he asks , you're allowed to say no"  

"i know that , i like going in" 

"even when we're meant to be spending time together for the first time in months" he said and i frowned at him.

"what do you mean?" 

"well , this is the first time we've sat together in basically months , when was the last time we lied in together , or the last time we went on a date or the last time we even went grocery shopping together or did anything together?" he said and i could tell that he'd been holding that in.

"if that's how you felt then why didn't you say anything before-"

"because you love your job and i didn't wanna bring it up. but it happens everytime we're together and now we aren't gonna celebrate our three year anniversary together?" 

"i'm sorry you felt like you couldn't bring it up , but i can't bail on work everytime they call" i raised my voice a little.

"so what's gonna happen in a few years when we decide to start a family? are you just gonna ditch the kids everytime lewis calls you?" he said also raising his voice. 

"of course not mattia what the fuck!" i shouted , hurt that he'd even say that. 

"so what would happen then?"

"i don't know! but i would never do that"

"look , i know how much you love your job and i didn't wanna bring it up because i don't wanna be selfish. but we've never been as distant as we have been these past few months and i hate it"

"then what do you want me to do? i've dreamed of this job since i was a kid. i love working there so much. yes i do hate that we haven't spent much time together recently and i'm sorry. this job means a lot to me"

"does it mean more to you than our relationship?"  he asked quietly.

i looked at him and his eyes were slightly watering. at this moment i knew my answer but i had no energy left in me and i just looked him. of course it wasn't more important than him. 

if only i had said that at the time. 

"good to know" he shook his head and grabbed his car keys and i saw a tear slip down his cheek as he left. lynx went to follow him but he shut the door before he caught up. 

fuck. 

i laid on my back in the middle of the carpet as tears streamed down my face. fuck y/n what have you done. 

after about an hour and a half of crying with lynx on my lap , my phone rang. it wouldn't be lewis because i had texted him and told him i wasn't coming. i didn't know who it was and it was on the other side of the room so i let it ring. it wouldn't be mattia either. 2 minutes later it started ringing again so this time i got up to answer it and saw jemma was calling. 

"Y/N WHERE ARE YOU" she yelled through the phone and she sounded like she'd been crying. 

"home, why are you shouting" 

and then she told me. 

and i broke down completely.

 she told me someone was coming to get me and it was gonna be okay but i couldn't hear much over the sound of my heart beating in my chest and the tears flooding down my face.

fuck. 

A/N-

guyyssss😭😭😭 lowkey broke my own heart while writing this.

i was actually productive today with some of the work i needed to do so becuase of that im rewarding myself by updating TWICE today as well so you wont be left on a cliffhanger for long.

bruh this shit made me sad 😭

i hope you guys are all okay tho. ily😽

also- we finished the 'pick up the phone' songg chain i was so proud✨

ogey see you in a little while