The Cheerleader's Side Piece

The Cassie I Love(8)

"Alright let's give it a try," I cross my legs, holding my knee to keep my right leg from sliding.  Cassie inhales for ten seconds, then exhales for ten seconds.  She continues the cycle for a good minute, really concentrating on her breathing.  "So whenever you feel stressed or that you're losing control, I want you to do this exercise.  It forces yourself to focus on your breathing and on nothing else, so it's a good way to clear your mind," I said as she opens her eyes and smiles.  It's been two months since she's woken up.  She's getting some of her strength back, walking is even becoming almost normal for her.  Her recovery is astounding to the doctors. 

"Antonia?" She asked.

"Yes?"

"What is my illness?" She asked.  It must be weighing on her mind.  All she knows is she's in a hospital because of an 'accident' and that a psychologist is evaluating her every move.  "I understand if you think I'm not ready to know... it's just... I think if you tell me what happened to me, the accident I mean, then maybe my memory will return faster and maybe if I know what my sickness is, I can also change faster."

Sighing, I place my notebook down and level my eyes to hers, "Cassidy... I understand your frustration and your anxiety.  I too would want to know but as your psychologist, I will know when it is the right time for you to find out.  Right now, you need to focus on getting your physical strength back and controlling your anxiety."

The nurse knocked on the door with Cassie's lunch, so I went over to grab it.  The nurses have been distant with her since her attack.  It's not surprising but it is a bit hurtful to see them so... unprofessional.  Brining her lunch to her little table, Cassie says, "I've been hiding something."

"Like?"

"Ani," she muttered.  I stopped assembling everything and immediately gave her my attention.  She was peering out the window, staring off at something once again.  "I see her often... I remember her.  Well... parts of her," she said.

Grabbing the chair I was in, I sit beside her and ask, "Can you explain?"

"She's... beautiful...  when I see her in flashes through the day, I see her smiling or laughing.  She... sometimes I see her working on something or staring at the board in school.  It's weird but... it seems that I was so drawn to her," she confessed, coughing a little, "one of my memories, her and I are sitting by this tree in what looks like a school field.  She was staring at the grass, examining it almost.  I sorta remember calling her a 'dork' or something along those lines when she held up a ladybug to me... but... I don't really remember the labybug... I just remember seeing her smile so much."

Folding my arms, I clear my throat, "Who is Ani?"

"Someone... someone I loved," she muttered, a tear slipping down her cheek.  She turned to me, wiping the tear away and chuckling, "See.... every time I think of her or see something, I cry.  Did... did she die or something?  Did something happen to her?"  Her voice cracked as she clung onto her bedsheets.  She looked as if she was to break out into a sob.  Between her raspy voice and spread words she said, "I-I have this dream... I... I did something to her.... something terrible Antonia.... I.... I..."

"What did you do?" Her body curled into itself.  It seemed as if she was trying to hide herself from the truth.  But I wouldn't let her, "What did you do Cassidy?"

A sob left her mouth, her body shaking uncontrollably.  "I hurt her.... I... I pushed her, pinned her, bit her... I did so many horrible things to her!  I hurt her time and time again, I watched her cry and break down because of me.  I-I... I don't know why.... I don't know why I hurt her, why I did the things I did... I don't get it... why would I do that to someone that meant so much to me?  Why Antonia?  Why did I hurt her so badly?"  She cried and cried... clinging to me like I had all the answers. 

It was the Cassie I knew that was finally shown.

The Cassie I love.

How's life my lovelies??? I hope you guys are doing well!  Leave thoughts, questions, and ideas!