Hold on I still want you

Chapter 8

Raphael knew it was a bad idea to go to Luke's house but he needed to see Simon so badly. Simon wasn't answering his calls, Raphael understood Simon had every right not to answer his calls. But Raphael needed to hear his voice, he desperately wanted to make things right. If he couldn't have Simon the way he wanted, he would rather have him as his friend than not in his life at all. 

Raphael nervously waited after he had rang the door bell. Part of Raphael was tempted to run away, he could use his vampire speed and no one would know he was even there. Raphael stopped himself from running, he had been the one to hurt Simon and he couldn't run from his mistake. Raphael had hoped Simon would answer the door but his heart sunk when it was Jace.

"What the hell are you doing here?" 

"I need to see Simon". 

"Simon doesn't want to see you, leave now", Jace said threateningly. 

"Jace wait, it's okay I need to talk to him". 

Jace was startled when Simon spoke from behind him. He had been so focused on his anger that he hadn't heard Simon follow him. "Are you sure?" 

Simon smiled at Jace's protective tone, "Yeah I'll be okay". 

"Okay but call me if he tries anything", Jace said glaring at Raphael before going back to the living room. 

"Simon I'm so, so sorry I tried to kiss you. Things were just starting to get better between us and I messed up. Please forgive me". 

"I want to, but what if you try to do that again?" 

"I promise I won't, you mean too much to me to lose you over this. If I never get to kiss you again but you are still in my life, then I will never kiss you again. Unless you want me to?" Raphael couldn't stop himself adding. 

Simon looked away sadly, "I'm sorry Raphael I'm in love with Jace. But I still care about you, I want us to be friends". 

Raphael felt a pang of pain in his heart, but he was glad at least that Simon was willing to be friends. "Thank you Simon, I want to make up for my behaviour. Can I help Luke and Jace protect you?"

"Yeah I would like that", Simon said with a hopeful smile. 

Simon led Raphael into the house and closed the door. Jace was not happy at all when he saw Raphael coming in. 

"Why is he here Simon?" 

"He wants to help protect me". 

"Oh sure that's all he wants to do", Jace said sarcastically. 

"Hey! I only want to be friends with Simon and I am afraid for his safety". Raphael knew in his heart that he was lying, he didn't only want to be friends with Simon. But his friendship was better than nothing and Jace didn't have to know that. He just hoped Simon wouldn't tell him what he said. 

"Jace please, let him help". 

Jace sighed, "Fine, but I'm watching you". Jace warned Raphael. 

After making sure it was okay with Luke, Raphael stayed overnight in a guest room so he could protect Simon better. Raphael would have preferred to take Simon back to his hotel, but he knew there were bad memories of Camille there and of his and Simon's fights when they were together. Raphael wished he was a daylighter so he could protect Simon during the day when he went out, but at least he could protect him at home or at night. 

Alec was curled up on the sofa trying to watch a movie but his thoughts were all focused on Magnus. Alec missed Magnus so much, he longed to be in Magnus' arms. But Magnus still had not returned. Alec only had one day of his week off now. He had been hoping to spend his week with Magnus. But he had spent it heartbroken and alone as Clary was back with Izzy now.