Drowning

Chapter 34:

"Did you murder someone?" Brynn asked, gasping for air between laughs.

"Go ahead, make fun of me, get it over with." I was humiliated. "I'm going upstairs to bed. Enjoy your dinner." My face fell and I could feel the sadness creep over me. All I needed now was a little black rain cloud following me around.

"Seriously, what happened?" Anna stopped laughing when she spotted the defeated expression on my face.

Anna's empathy was one of the traits I adored about her most. My best friend, on the other hand, was doing her best to enjoy the most comfortable seat in the house. She had on a little black skirt that barely covered her lady parts and a halter top that sat dangerously low on her perfectly thin chest. Seriously, who dressed like that to go have dinner at somebody's parent's house?

"I was training a new girl and she dropped the sauce bucket. Not much of a story. I am going to go change. No more questions. Goodnight." I took one last look over at Ezra, who didn't make eye contact with me. His lack of interest in even looking in my direction hurt my feelings. I turned to storm out of the room to stomp up the stairs.

"Peanut, we were just teasing. Don't be mad. Come back down for dinner. Don't be like that." My Mom yelled.

I was embarrassed. I was angry with Brynn and Ezra. There was no way I was going to sit and watch her hang herself all over him tonight and him touch her the way I wanted him to touch me. I didn't have any right to be angry with either of them since nothing was going on between us, but that didn't stop my brain from being furious. I couldn't just let him go.

I reached the stairs and I felt a soft hand on my arm.

"What?" I turned around sharply. I was surprised to see Aiden standing there. My angry outburst made him take a step back.

"Whoa!" He said, throwing his hands up in defense. "Are you ok? I know there's something wrong. Do you want to talk about it?" Aiden's voice was soft and full of worry.

"No, Aiden, I just had a really long day." My breathing slowed and my exhaustion started to take over my body.

"If you need to talk, let me know. You know I'm here. Please don't go hide in your room all night. You can ignore them, just talk to me if everyone else is pissing you off tonight." He placed his hand on mine on the banister. His fingertips gently rubbed my hand before he turned to go back to the living room.

I ran to my room and shut the door. I took off my shoes and threw them against the wall. I wanted to jump up and down, stomp my feet, and throw one of those toddler tantrums where you get on the floor and kick. I didn't want to go back downstairs. If Aiden hadn't begged me to come back down, I would not feel the least bit guilty about skipping dinner tonight.

I closed my eyes and imagined what going back down would be like. In my head, I saw Brynn and Ezra hanging all over each other. The image of them was so clear it was like I was really there. They were sitting at the kitchen table and Ezra swiped his hand across the table, knocking the food from in front of them. He lifted her up and moved her skirt up to bury himself in her. She moved expertly around him, taking his ring inside her. Ezra moaned Brynn's name and told her she is the only one who can make him feel this good. She talked dirty to him just like he liked while we all sat there, watching and taking bites of our lasagna. His eyes shifted to me and he pulled the corner of his mouth up in a wicked half-smile as he finished inside her.

My imagination was so much worse than reality. I couldn't stay up here and hide with just my thoughts. They were trying to murder me.

I was going back downstairs against my better judgment.

I opened my closet and searched for something to wear. I didn't have the energy to compete with Brynn tonight over Ezra. She would always get the guy over me any day. I was not competition to a girl like her. He would feel her body on his and forget all about me. I had almost no experience and she was a pro. Guys like him are what Brynn lived for. Girls like Brynn were never told no.