Lucy Lahey trusted the man she was dating, and it turned out to be her biggest mistake. Reeling in the aftermath of a rape that stole not only her virginity, but her confidence, her love for MMA, her clarity and more, Lucy now finds herself in Jerse...
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If I think too hard about what I'm doing this morning, it'll be impossible to follow through. It requires a lot of compartmentalizing so I don't focus on the fact that I'm going back to school where a whole lot of rumours exist.
I don't necessarily care what people think of me, but it's not the sort of attention I want.
Mom made me breakfast this morning, poached eggs and bacon, crisp. It makes me think of Niles.
She told me to let her know if I wasn't coping but she didn't coddle me or smother me with hugs.
I appreciated that.
Nari picked me up and we agreed to stick together no matter what. Although mom wanted me to drive Coen and I in her car, I wanted to go with Nari on the first day. She agreed and Coen decided to scooter.
As soon as we get out of the car, nostalgia clings to me. The sounds, the smells, the familiar cars and students. We walk through the parking lot and Nari looks at me.
"Is it weird or different?"
"It's not different as in, it looks different, it looks exactly the same. But it feels different. It's hard to explain."
"I think I get it," she says and we spot Gia on the other side of the lot, closest to the school field.
Her and a group of students are hanging around a pickup truck, she's messing with Colt, one of the football boys, the two of them laugh and kick at each other, playfighting. I like Colt, he's one of the nicer athletes and he never got along with Logan. It makes me wonder what all of them think of me, especially if they're close with Gia.
Nari and I go to homeroom after we've made a locker stop, I have a new one, a few feet from last semesters spot.
Throughout the morning, I get a few surprised greetings from girls who didn't expect to see me back, there's a lot of questions too, people wanting to know what happened and why I left. It isn't until I get to English Lit that someone outright asks about the rumours.
Maddie Balkman sits in the row in front of me, her white blonde braid swings behind her when she twists in her seat and chews on the tip of her pen.
Maddie and I used to get along well at school, we didn't hang out in social settings because of the separation in our circles, she's on the dance team and spends all of her time in competitions. She's nice. Bold too.
"Were you really pregnant?" She asks and I tell her the same thing I've told everyone else that's asked where I've been.
"No," I say. "Mom sent me to live with my dad because I got arrested a few times, just for stupid little things but it got too much for her. She finally let me come home when my behaviour improved."
It's a fraction of the truth, the most I can offer for now.
Maddie nods with a thoughtful smile. "It's good to see you. I didn't believe Logan anyway. He's a perv. And Gia literally getting with your ex and plastering it all over Insta. So not it."
