Locked in Permafrost

January

The chores for two people living in the arctic wilderness through the winter were not onerous. Thanks to Paul's careful planning and innovative construction, their work didn't involve hauling water or burying waste. Laundry by hand and shoveling snow were the most difficult regular chores Eric was allowed to do and Paul frowned the whole time when Eric insisted on taking a turn at shoveling.

Running a trap line and chopping firewood was undoubtedly harder, but as Paul didn't let him participate Eric didn't count them as part of his experience. He could sit on a stump in the barn and watch the wood chopping, and he did, to both their delight as one liked watching the muscles bulge and flex along his mate's arms and back and the other liked the erotic sensation of being watched with lascivious intent, but the extent of his idleness was beginning to bother Eric. Paul had a pile of frozen carcasses he warmed and dressed one after another and then began the tanning process on the hides in a corner of the barn, but the smells made Eric's nausea blossom into full-blown retching so he watched from a distance, or went into the cabin and worked on his cooking skills.

With limited food supplies and only two eaters, he couldn't go overboard in the kitchen. The most complicated things he could find online to try still barely kept him occupied. Before Christmas, he'd discovered antler crafts on Pinterest and Paul approved of him carving up some of the shed antlers he'd collected into various doodads. He expected a trapper to come by in a few weeks on his way to the Fur Rondy in Anchorage. The trapper would buy whatever he'd laid by through the year that they couldn't use themselves and add it to his goods to sell. Furs and antlers were good enough, but hand-crafts made out of them were more desirable. Eric had doubts that his primitive hand-crafts could improve the value of the antlers, but Paul still encouraged him.

The pile of furs from his subsistence hunting was substantial and they were all soft and beautifully tanned. When Eric asked how he'd learned such a skill Paul showed him a well-worn book on homesteading and explained that between that and the internet he'd educated himself for this life first instead of going to college.

He'd had a first-rate education through high school and didn't plan to abandon higher education entirely. After getting himself established he'd gone back and taken classes through the University of Alaska online. He was a few credits away from a degree but they were for required lab classes and that meant traveling back to civilization. If he left his cabin who would care for it? Who would care for his dogs? He could finish school in a summer semester, but he needed to prepare for the winter during summer. He was at an impasse with his education. He didn't need it for the life he planned to live so he let it go.

Eric was immensely proud of his college education. For Paul, it was about having the skills for life. For Eric, it was about being acknowledged by the world. He grew up in a foster home and between that and his secondary gender, the expectations for him at school were low. He earned his place and worked hard to keep it. The better his grades, the better company he could keep, and the better his prospects for a good mate and a life with security. That last bit was a spectacular failure.

Finding out Eric was old enough to have completed a college degree bothered Paul. He'd originally thought the other man was a teenager. His small build and pale coloring often fooled people, but his emaciated condition back then was more disturbing now, knowing the truth. "How?" he'd wondered aloud.

"They kept me locked up for four months before they disposed of me," Eric explained.

"They?" Paul persisted.

"My fiance's family. They were into some weird...imagine keeping human pets. They keep a vacation home in Alaska to hide their perversion. The bastard finally proposed and took me on a celebratory trip to his family's vacation home last June, right after graduation. I'd already met them at their L.A. mansion and they were incredibly sweet to me. It was part of the trap. They spend the summer enjoying their toy of the year at the vacation house and then dispose of them and go back to their normal lives like they didn't just commit a capital crime together. I have to admit, they choose their targets well. I was incredibly naive to believe he loved me. There were signs I ignored. And they're well aware that no one will be looking for me. If I do return to civilization and go to the police, who will believe my word against such a wealthy and powerful family. What gets me most is that right now they're probably grooming their next victim." Paul's jaw was slack as he listened to Eric's story.

"Names," he demanded when his voice returned. "I need names if we're going to stop them."

"What can we possibly do from here?" Eric asked.

"We can get information and information is everything when dealing with the rich and powerful." Paul shifted into action mode because he couldn't bear to think and talk anymore about what Eric had experienced in those four months. He couldn't imagine Eric wanted to rehash it either. The circumstances were different but their experiences were essentially the same. They'd both been betrayed, tormented, and harried toward death. They'd both disappeared in the wilderness and found each other here. It was too much like fate to ignore.

For himself, it was enough for Paul to escape, but for his mate, it was not enough. Something inside him snapped. His protective instinct had grown stronger than his self-preservation instinct. He'd become stronger, and it was time to use his strength. Moreover, he'd become smarter. Most of his classes were computer science classes since he had an interest in the subject and figured he would be able to make use of his degree from anywhere. "Names, please," he asked again.

The determination in Paul's eyes set off a chain reaction in Eric. He'd been passive about his situation until now, unable to imagine any meaningful action he could take, he simply ignored the occasional uncomfortable niggling in the back of his mind. He still couldn't imagine what Paul had in mind, but he was being given a tiny thread to start pulling on and maybe they could eventually unravel the spiderweb in which he'd been trapped last June.

Paul knew Eric's fiancé from boarding school. He was a year junior and a repulsive prick back then, too. Their families moved in the same circles which meant in confronting Eric's murderer, he'd probably be found again by his own. He paused as he realized this and Eric, standing behind him where he sat working on the computer, rested his hands on Paul's shoulders, concerned that his frenetic searches suddenly came to a halt.

"I know them," Paul admitted.

"That means if you help me your own family may find you," Eric guessed.

"Yeah."

"You don't have to," Eric said and laid his head down atop Paul's. "It's enough that you wanted to." There was a feeling of peace that flowed through Paul from the warm head resting atop his own.

Paul took another deep breath. "I have to. For myself as well as for you. It's time to take them all out before they cause more damage. We can't move forward like this and I...," he took Eric's right hand from his shoulder and held it in both of his own. "I want to move forward with you."

This time it was Eric who was caught off guard. Tears pricked his eyes and he reached down with his left arm to wrap it around Paul's chest and squeeze. This man never used the word "love" but he expressed love with better words, so effectively that Eric felt like he was drowning in it. He was loved. His mate loved him. These were tears of happiness he held back.

The next weeks were spent gathering information and discussing strategy. In between, they clung to each other, making love in the firelight. A new passion infused their intimacy since they began sharing their past lives.

Trouble shared is halved, and Paul felt his anxiety and paranoia diminish with each passing day as he opened his heart to Eric. They still failed to talk about important present concerns like Eric's pregnancy, but Paul looked up prenatal advice while his mate slept and cared for his mate in that way without him knowing.

He had several extra hours of privacy in his day since the pregnancy was making Eric sleep more. When he wasn't doing chores or working on their research project, he began to seriously prepare for his impending fatherhood. Eric had no clothes of his own but what he was wearing the day he arrived. He'd been wearing Paul's which were large on him, but not large enough for his entire pregnancy. Alterations would be needed. And then, the baby would need many things. Although they'd have to return to civilization to give birth and could shop, starting a list now could be a good idea. He downloaded an E-book on childcare and parenting in primitive cultures as well as a highly rated modern parenting book and began reading and comparing to see what could be done in the wilderness and what they would need civilization's help with.

He'd learned early on to look at primitive and indigenous people's lifestyles and ways of doing things because modern ones weren't always applicable or even possible out in the arctic. The Inuit raised many generations of children on the North Slope. It was only ever a matter of learning how. He could do the same. He'd done the same with coming and living here, building a home and a life he enjoyed. He would learn to be a good daddy. His heart leapt at the idea but he confined his preparation times to when Eric slept, for fear his mate wouldn't share his growing excitement at the prospect.