Limonene |H. S.|

15. oh, father

I've never been one to doubt myself, or to cower back and let people walk all over me, intimidate me. That's not who I am. I'm also not the person who pulls over on the side of the road and calms her breathing, repeating to herself that everything was fine.

Yet here I am.

It wasn't enough that I had to change my outfit at least half a dozen times, redo my makeup because I was sure the double winged eyeliner was a tad too much and put on two layers of deodorant because my nerves would have me reeking. All that wasn't enough, I played relaxing music the whole drive to Harry's house and now, just a couple metres away from his gateway, I was pulled to the side and almost hyperventilating in the car.

I was running a bit late, embarrassingly enough I was supposed to arrive ten minutes ago. My phone was ringing and when I turned it over Harry's name flashed, but I couldn't answer. Not right now, my voice would probably tremble and I'd be damned if I were to let him hear me cry.

"You're going to be fine." I say loudly even if it's only me in the car. The rearview mirror reflects my worried face and gradually, I fix myself.

I fix myself because this isn't a situation worth fretting over. It's just parents, parents like me. I'm a likeable person and the impressions I've made on my exboyfriends' parents are remarkable. So why was this particular set of people causing me so much angst? Perhaps it's their past that gets me, my dad is an infamous ass-kisser of this family, and he made sure I knew just how important they were before I left.

And plus, Katia was going to be here too, as if it wasn't too much already. Just because of her, I will myself to shift the car into drive, successfully entering the driveway this time. I wasn't about to back down from the subtle duel she had challenged me to earlier at the cafe.

A lone man emerges from the security booth once I come closer and roll down my window. "Hi." I sigh and he frowns.

"Finally got the nerve?" The guard asks, cocking a brow.

"Excuse me?" My dumbfounded act was useless.

"Cameras." He shrugs and looks back to the booth. "The car seemed suspicious at first, then Harry told me what you were driving and to let you in."

"Oh, I was just fixing my makeup."

"Sure you were, sweetie. I'll open 'em up for you." I smile in gratitude but he's already turned around. He does something and then the tall gates slowly open. I drive ahead and around the fountain in the middle, deciding to park my car right behind the black Volkswagen beetle. The small vehicle seemed so out of place, I could only imagine it belongs to Harry's not-ex-girlfriend.

After giving myself another minute to cool off, I finally get out of the car. On the contrary to how I feel on the inside, I'm pretty proud of my outside. My small-heeled ankle boots were comfortable and looked pretty, as did my black jeans and long sleeved, silky green top.

As I was grabbing my handbag and securing the coat on my shoulders, I am made aware that there's someone else out here. Harry's friend, Zayn, is sitting on one of the stairs leading up to the front door, a cigarette in his hand as he aimlessly stares ahead. I clear my throat to catch his attention, hoping he truly is lost in thought and not purposefully ignoring me.