Red of Berlin

Chapter Twelve: Confessions

Adèle's point of view:

It was like he had smashed my heart and mind into a million pieces. I felt like fainting when I first heard Michael say it. It only took five words for me to go completely haywire on emotion, like I had just been hit by an electric fence. Michael was in love with me, and that was the reason he took me in. He loved me, despite everything that differed between us, he was in love with me. I didn't know what to say to him, I didn't know how to process what I was feeling. My heart was beating fast and my skin was going numb from the coldness of the rain.

"Excuse me?" Was all I could muster up. I couldn't believe he just said that to me. But how did I feel? What exactly did I think about Michael? Everything was so torn up and flawed beyond belief, but deep down where everything remained real, what did I feel?

"I am pretty sure you heard me, Adèle. Look, I am sorry I kept you waiting when it came to answers. But how on earth was I supposed to explain something like that so quickly? My feelings needed to develop, I needed to know you more. It was almost instantaneous for me, but I didn't know how you felt. All I knew at the beginning was that it seemed like you hated me, which I understood. Yet, here we are. So tell me, Adèle, how do you feel?" Michael asked me. I was still trying to find that out, trying to discover if I hated him or liked him, or even loved him. He had done so much for me, but at the same time we were on two opposite sides. There were feelings, but which ones did I feel for him?

"I do hate you," I said, and then I realized what I had to say, "but I like you too. So, if I'm right about this observation, I should probably just decide that I love you as well." When the words fell from my mouth and into the atmosphere, I felt a weight falling from my shoulders. When I realized then that I had told him that I loved him, a whole wave of realism came washing over me. It was true. I loved Michael Armbrüster.

"You love me?" He asked. I nodded, my body frozen to once place. What else was there to say now? All confession had been solved, there were no more hidden feelings.

"I know it's strange. You and I should hate each other. But maybe that's what made us fall in love," I considered. He nodded, and silence fled through the atmosphere. Our eyes cascaded over the other, me staring into the ocean and him looking to the storm.

Then we kissed. It was sensual, fast and powerful. Michael's grasp righted on my waist as my fingers traced the skin of his cheeks, pulling his lips closer to mine. I felt his hand trail up to my back as he held me to his strong and toned body as I felt the hard push of his muscular torso along my abdomen. A fire welled within me, burning brighter with each moment we kissed. I felt the soft scratching of his nails as they calmly dragged down my arms. For once in my life, there was no worry. It was when his lips touched mine that I felt truly whole, like he was all I needed to survive.

"Let me take you home," Michael said. I sighed and nodded my head, finally listening to him. He took my hand and lead me up the forest, leading me out of the bush and making out way to the villa.

"I just have one condition," I said to him as we walked. I felt the rustling of the leaves on the ground as we walked, my bare feet cold from the rain. I didn't think to put on shoes when I was running out of the house in a huff.

"What is that?" He asked me.

"I know now what you do for a living. I know why we're living here. All I can say is that I want nothing to do with it. I just want to be with you, nothing else. Take me dancing, take me to dinner, love me all you want. But I don't want to be a part of that," I explained. He knew I was talking about the camp he was told to work at. Michael didn't have a choice since he had been recently promoted, but that still meant I had the choice. And my choice was that I wanted nothing to do with it.