All Because Of Him

sixty two.

   My eyes scan over the face in front of me and suddenly my heart feels like it's beating once again, as if life has just been restored back into me just from his body standing so close to mine. 

He looks different, his dark hair is tousled around on the top of his head like he's been running his fingers through it. His face is masked with no emotion, the same as it normally is, but this time there's something obscure about it.

I hate how aware I am of him. How I notice every little change in his physical appearance that ties between his emotions. Most of all, I hate that even though I should be angry with him, I can still feel the electrical spark between us that I keep trying to diffuse.

He presses his lips together, his brows knitted as he waits for my response.

"What? No." I scoff at his absurd accusation.

He looks at me like he's about to call me out on my bullshit, and I swear the longer his eyes look into mine the more I feel my knees start to go weak. I haven't been this close in proximity to him in five days, and I can't deny the fact that it's been killing me.

Being around him makes me feel a different kind of hurt than I feel whenever I'm away from him. It's like a painful reminder that the man in front of me will never be mine.

"What do you want, Mason?" I dare to ask as I fold my arms across my chest and glare towards him.

"I take it by your tone that you're still mad at me." His tone is mockingly derisive and he looks at me like a code he can't decipher.

"Are you forgetting everything you said to me? Because I sure haven't."

"You're being emotional, it isn't necessary."

My heart sinks even further and I blink at him, stunned that he has the audacity to treat me like this after everything we've been through.

That he deliberately treats me like I'm a child, or someone he can just bark orders to without facing any repercussions of his own.

"Oh so now how I'm feeling is an inconvenience to you?" I let out a short humorless laugh. I can see the look of clear irritation cloud over his face and I continue. "This is what you wanted isn't it? To push me away? To make me want nothing to do with you? Well congratulations, you got it."

Either I see him wince at my words or I'm just imagining things.

"I don't get what the big deal is. You didn't actually think I had feelings for you did you?"

His words leave me stunned and I feel all the color drain from my face. Embarrassment swarms through my body, and the weight on my chest that I have managed to rid myself of has returned, only adding another thirty pounds to it.

I feel my body going numb, not because of my feelings towards him but because the thought of him having feelings for me sounds completely preposterous to him.

He studies the look on my face and I watch as every tense muscle in his body relaxes. Just as the realization hits him that I did in fact believe that it could have been possible.

"Isebelle, I-" he begins, but we're both caught off guard by Jessica's voice closing in on us.

"Elle, did you finish?" I tear my gaze off Mason and turn towards Jessica who's now standing side by side to Aiden.

I hear Mason huff beside me, "Yeah-yeah, I finished." I say, my voice a shaky mess.

The hurt I feel is trying to break free and I do everything in my power to keep it hidden under the surface. My heart feels achy and heavy in my chest and I swallow the lump forming in my throat.