Hidden love; blind to color

thirteen: Losing hope

"Due to recent cutbacks and until further notice, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off."

Sage
I wipe my sleepy eyes as I pick up my mug of coffee off of the counter. As I walk into the living room, I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror hanging on the wall. My eyes have bags beneath them and I don't look like my natural self.

Sighing, I walk past the couches and take a seat in my bay window. I tiredly lean my head back against the window frame.

I feel exhausted, I haven't slept in a few nights and it's now the weekend and I just want to sleep all day. And that's what I plan to do.

"Morning." Opal says as she walks into the living room. I smile half heartedly. I look out of the window and watch the same cop car stroll down the street for the twentieth time this morning.

Since the protest, riots and all the violence Erupting across the city, the police have been working overtime. Patrolling the streets. Seems like the entire city has been on edge.

"Sage, you can't stay like this forever." Opal comments as she pours herself a cup of coffee.

I look toward her, confused. "Like what?" I ask.

"Sad. I know with everything going on right now, it's hard to be happy. But you have to try to be. You can't spend your days being sad because that's just wasting your time." She says seriously.

I stare into my mug. "And what good does it do to be sad or stress? Huh? It's does nothing." She takes a large gulp of coffee before putting the mug in the sink.

I roll my eyes at her wasting a cup of perfectly good coffee. "I'm just tired. That's all." I mumble.

"Have you talked to Ashton?" She ask, raising an eyebrow. I nod, knowing full well that I haven't seen him in days. I've been...avoiding him.

"Yes...we talked a few days ago." I haven't been around many people, especially Ashton since the protest. I just don't want anyone to become suspicious of us or anything in the midst of what's going on, so I'm limiting my time with him. After what I have seen at the protest, I don't want to risk him getting hurt.

A part of me, has no hope left for whatever we could be. A part of me doesn't even feel like trying anymore. The only outcome for us is violence and pain, neither of which I want for him. But a very large part of me promised to fight this, for us, for him and I intend on keeping that promise but his safety comes first. 

"Well, hopefully you get your ass up today and go see your man." She grabs her coat off of the back of the chair before walking toward the front door. "I'll see you later Hun, love ya." She calls out before leaving.

I sink into the bay window. Taking a sip of my coffee.
Somehow, I fall asleep. Drifting off into a dream about the cute man next door.

Ashton

I stir the tomato sauce in my pan on the stove, trying to calm my mind. I can never keep my thoughts together but lately, it's been worse.

I walk to the sink before rinsing off my hands. I stop when I glance out my window toward the familiar apartment building across the street.

Stories high in a six feet wide bay window, with the curtains to the sides of the pane, sits Sage. I realize she's sleeping instead of reading, her small form curled into a ball. I can't make out much details of her from here which irritates the shit out of me.

But from here, she looks amazing.

I haven't seen her in a few days, and I miss her. I miss her soft voice and those big doe eyes that makes my heart turn to mush.