Stepbrothers

Part 6

For several nights, Loki had nightmares.
In his bad dreams, he saw a terrified blond boy behind a tiny bathroom window, slamming his bloody hands on the hard glass and screaming for help. His copper-red hand-prints covered the surface with blood, until he disappeared under the traces.
Sometimes, the blond boy turned into present Thor and sometimes, his hair turned black and he became a younger Loki.
Sometimes, Loki was awakened by his own screams. Those times, not only was he totally confused, but he had his bed surrounded by a startled Fran, an annoyed Larry and a pale-faced, real-life Thor standing quietly at the door.
"This can't go on, son !" Larry used to say in those moments. "It's been weeks since you're turning this house upside down at night ! What on earth is wrong with you ?!"
Loki would have loved to tell everyone everything he knew but most of the times, he kept quiet, shaking his head, unable to speak while a pair of worried steel-blue eyes were looking at him.
It was harder than ever to escape this silent blue glare.

***

Sometimes Loki found himself smarter than everyone. Not right now. Right now, he wished he had a second butt or another pair of legs so he can smack himself one for being a huge ass. He was in it like without-paddle-deep and it was his one and only fault.
He wanted to play a game that had tremendous consequence and like a know-it-all little kid he had fallen into the trap. He had learned things that shouldn't be learned and cannot be un-learned.
Thor's and his mother's past.
Thor. The boy with bloody hands beating at the tiny window.

Now, it was impossible to separate beautiful, strong and present Thor with that nightmarish vision. It was almost eerie. Thor ? Football quarterback Thor ? A former victim of parental abuse and neglect ? Right here and now he looked more like he would punch his abuser to the ground and send him to the hospital for the duration as a favor. It was equally impossible to picture the more than capable and ambitious Fran as a battered or, even worse, locked up woman...
On the other hand, that was maybe easy to imagine because both of them were strong enough to survive it, move on with their lives without a backward glance and even succeed beyond any statistics known about victims of abuse. Only them could go on, apparently unscathed... Apparently.
Because now, Thor's possessive attitude might have a reason Loki didn't want to reflect upon. And more so, Fran and her will to provide for the motherless Loki and act the perfect wife for the widower Larry might also have a sinister side.
On one hand, it might be another proof they wanted to put the past behind and be happy.
On the other, they might be both so traumatized they were both doing too much, too soon, too fast. Really ? Getting married after a month or two of relationship ? Falling in love with your future stepbrother ?? Being jealous and making a scene for talking to some girl ??

And the other big problem was, what to do with this little piece of information ? This tiny little detail that might blow everything up and destroy their lives forever ?

Before Loki felt alone because he was dallying in self-pity and emotional auto-drama. Now, it was because he had set his foot where he shouldn't have and couldn't tell a soul about it.
Except....
No he didn't want to go that path.
Shut his trap and live on. That was the only option for now. He had to take responsibility and shut up. For now.
And not to interfere and not be a smart-ass. Until further notice.

***

The wedding was coming and fast. Invitations were sent, costumes were made, caterer ready, so were flowers, gazebos, napkins and so on... Once upon a time, Loki would have wanted to throw up at what he deemed an insult to his mother. Now he just wanted it over with as fast as possible. Whether it was a good thing or not, only time would tell. That was not the biggest issue right now. Fran didn't seem a threat to Larry, on the contrary.
The biggest issue was tall, blond, finely muscled and damn annoying.
Thor was holding back. Loki gave him that. But since the nightmare crisis that lasted a few weeks, Thor was clearly trying to act like a nanny. Checking him at night, watching his diet (to Thor's defense, that was an issue: Loki was eating less and less due to his inner tension) and even demanding that Loki drinks a beverage of milk and honey supposedly to help him sleep. That would have been hilarious if Loki had not been so nervous. To avoid any discussion, Loki complied to everything, even ridiculous little things like going to school and back together. Something they never did (or more likely something that Loki deliberately avoided).
But instead of soothing Thor, it was just getting him more worried. Mostly because Loki was also preventing any kind of serious discussion between them, making only boring small talk about the wedding and school and college, that kind of stuff.