The Last Knight

Ch. 8: Let The Past Die

04/08/2023: Edited & reposted 

It had been days since you'd seen another human being. Kylo Ren had left the base immediately following the encounter with Snoke. Meanwhile, a deep, unforgiving darkness had swallowed you, possessing every thought and movement. It was as if you had somehow kept the darkness at bay for years, and seeing the old shambles of your makeshift home had split you open and unleashed a monster.

Buried next to the monster had been your ability to wield the force with more power than anyone in the First Order had truly known. Luke had called it a gift, but for your whole childhood, it had been a curse. It had torn your family apart, left your village casting you away as a demon, and had landed you starving to death in the ice caves. You could never seem to control it, but you were able to bury it. Well... at least you used to be able to.

You were scared.

You had almost crumbled an entire base without meaning to. Now that Kylo Ren knew of your hidden talents, he would surely eliminate you. Either that, or he'd report you to Snoke and then kill you.

But, surely Snoke already knew somehow?

Master Luke had known intuitively, and he was able to find you just by the energy that you had given off.

There was no way Snoke didn't already know... you'd assumed that might be the reason why he'd let you stay in the first place.

But now, with Kylo Ren knowing... you had a target on your back. With your newly exposed power, coupled with the fact that your mind was closed off to him, it was only a matter of time before he suspected that you had ulterior motives. You looked like a criminal.

It took you at least two days to convince yourself that leaving the First Order was the best option. With any luck, you'd be able to hitch a ride to The New Kessel on the Night Buzzard the next time your counterparts were in the mood for a drink. You could probably steal a ship, but that would draw too much attention and you weren't very good at flying. It was simpler to ditch your drunken comrades and convince someone to give you a ride to a far corner of the galaxy where you could start over. You were thinking a desolate planet like Jakku would do. And this time, it would be easier to start over because you had a little bit of money saved up.

You spent the third day going through your meager belongings to figure out what you should bring and what you could probably sell. It wasn't long before you had a small bag packed with a few extra sets of clothes, some food, a few knives, and all the credits you had to your name.

The fourth day, you spent reminiscing. A few of the knights were off duty tonight and you had overheard them talking about leaving the base through the thin walls of your shared apartment.

Today was the day. It was time to move on.

You had been unable to face them since the failed capture at Echo Base, and you couldn't bring yourself to give them any true parting words. However, you took a few minutes to listen to their voices and memorize the way they sounded. While you may not have been close, they were the closest thing you had to family. You paid careful attention to remember the bickering between Ap'lek and Kuruk as they fought over the last snack. You took special notice of Vicrul's rare commentary. The sound of Cardo's voice at your door nearly broke your heart. He had been knocking every day, several times a day, begging you to explain yourself. He really had been a true friend.

When you were sure they had all left the apartment that afternoon, you decided to venture out for a last look at Starkiller Base. You wanted to run the ice-covered training course one last time before you had to give up your claim on the force and lie low for the rest of your life. The course wasn't far from the main building of the base, lying just at the start of the westernmost forest. You remembered when you first started running this course—how impossible it had been. Now, it was like saying goodbye to an old friend. You tightened the laces on your boots and stood up, crunching the snow as you shifted from leg to leg. You took comfort in the way that the sound echoed through the trees when you ignited your lightsaber. You were just about to set out when you heard voices behind you, calling your name.