When Love Met Destruction (Sitkolson)

Kiss, Kiss Kiss!

*Ricky's POV*

        I don't know what just happened, but it felt weird. Was Ryan gay? I mean, what he just did was certainly pointing towards that idea. But, no, he couldn't be! Ryan had a girlfriend just two months ago. Sure, that relationship only lasted a little less than a month and he never had  a girlfriend before that... Oh, shit, maybe he was gay. 

        But I, on the other hand, am certainly not gay. I never have been and i never will be. Sure, i may have gotten an erection with Ryan, but that doesn't mean anything. I am definitely not into guys. I am as straight as an arrow, and i refuse to believe otherwise. I've never liked guys before and i doubt I'm going to start now. 

        "Ricky... are you deaf?" I finally ended my daze of thoughts and focused back into real life. My eyes finally landed on Ghost who was right in front of me, practically sitting on my lap. 

        "Huh?" What are they even talking about?

        "We're going to be at the first venue in a few hours, get Ryan will ya?" My mind finally followed what they were saying and i wasn't too happy about it. I mean, i was happy about the gig... but i didn't want to be around Ryan right now, after what he just did. It would be awkward.

        "no." I answered nervously, avoiding Ghosts stare. "You tell him." I tried to conceal my shaking, and remain calm, but I'm not sure if they bought it or not. 

        He looked at me oddly. "Whats wrong with your legs, hes your best friend..."

        "I never said that." i answered quickly, then looked down at my lap. I was no longer 'hard' which was a relief, but just the memory was sending my mind into a frenzy. I shifted uncomfortably underneath Ghost and looked up at him, almost pleading. 

        "Just go tell him, road kill." Oh the nicknames we give each other.  I sighed and got to my feet, shoving ghost off of me. 

        Entering the room slowly, i hid behind the door. "Ryan..." I finally spotted him  curled up in a ball in the corner of his bunk. He wasn't sleeping though because i could see his rapid breathing and him rocking back and forth in pace. He instantly froze when he heard my hoarse voice. 

        "what do you want?" I could have sworn i heard him sniffle. I sighed and moved closer to him. I didn't want to get too close to him again because i dint want anything to happen again by accident. I was just going to stop in quickly and tell him that we were almost there. But i couldn't just eave him here so vulnerable. Damn, my good nature.  I moved closer and sat at the end of his bunk bed. He curled up tighter in his corner and hid away from me. Letting out my breath that i was holding, i looked over to him and tried to be as friendly as i could be. 

        And then i started talking. "We're almost at the gig..." I figured that was a good place to start off at. He made a weird, pouting sound in response. "What's up with you lately?" I didn't want to know the answer. I wasn't being rude, i was just trying to save my own feelings and our friendship at the least.   He didn't answer me, just pulled blankets over his head more. I lai back on his bed more, resting my head against the wall, propped up by a soft pillow. 

        "Why are you still here?" Ryan peeked out from underneath his thick blanket.

        "Oh, so now i cant talk to my friend?" I chuckled sarcastically.

        He shrugged the shifted in his place slightly, so that he could look at me directly. " What do you want?" His repeated, his tone came out harsh and im pretty sure he meant it that way, which absolutely hurt like a bitch. He was my friend and his hurtful words felt like knives being skewered and twisted in my gut. 

        "Ouch." I seethed and looked down at my hands which felt cold in my lap. "Was it what happened before?" I asked out of curiosity, knowing his reaction wouldn't be too swell. He'd probably lie, because that's what Ryan did when he felt uncomfortable. He didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings, or make the situation even more awkward than it already was. 

        "Yes." I looked at him in surprise, because i thought he'd lie straight to my face. But, instead, he told me straight to my face, the truth. That incident was bothering him, and it was bothering me too. I didn't know what he felt or what he was thinking. I don't think he even knew what he felt or the thoughts that ran through his head.

        "Yeah, i figured." I let out a groan of reluctance to this conversation, but i figured that its better to get it over with sooner rather than later.  "What even happened?" 

        He took a deep breath, sorting through his words to put together a coherent sentence that mad sense to both of us. "I don't know." Really? That's all he could come up with?

        "Well... we fell-" I started, trying to jog his memory, well not his memory, more like his emotions. I was trying to make sense of his emotions.

        "Yeah, i got that part..." He mumbled unsurely. He smirked to himself at the thought, then lost his grin when he moved towards me a little, out of the comforting mess of his corner. I didn't move on the contrary. I didn't want him to think that i was scared of him, which i wasn't. Ryan wasn't scary, he couldn't hurt fly even if he tried. 

        "And then you-" I began, my voice quivering slightly at the memory. 

        "i know what i did." He said sternly, interrupting my sentence. "It's just that-" He thought for a second. "i don't know. I don't know why i did it..."

        "Fine, then lets just forget any of this ever happened, and be friends again!" i said cheerily, trying to get him out of his down mood. "Wouldn't want it to be awkward on stage right?" I felt a smile perking up onto my lips. He smirked as well then nodded.

        "Kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss!" Chanted Josh, Ghost, and Chris from the doorway. I nearly lept out of my skin, because i didn't know they were there. Ryan's eyes were impossibly wide like a deer's as he froze up in shock. He was definitely not good in situations like these.

        "Get out of here..." I chuckled and shooed the men away from us, then we went back out to the main part of the tour bus, leaving Ryan to cope with his motion sickness and nerves on his own.

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Sorry this took forever to update, i just had writers block and couldn't think of much, but still... yo know what to d0.

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