Brighter Places [🗸]

17. some things don't hurt as bad

The weight of the world seems to be dragging me down as I make my way down the over crowded hallways of school the next day.

I'm so fucking exhausted.

My fist rubs at my eyes, the bags beneath them more than prominent. I haven't been this out-of-it in months. 

I make sure to keep my head down, weaving around the different students, dark waves falling in front of my eyes. 

But before I can slip into the next classroom unnoticed, three all-too-familiar people come to a stop in front of me, bringing me to a reluctant halt.

"Jason!" I hear Dani's voice rise, hands rising to her chest as Riya makes her way closer to me, eyes widened as she asks, "where were you?"

A flurry of questions greet me, the two girls talking a mile a minute, Dani distractedly pushing curls out of her face as questions slip from her lips, concern dripping from her tone. Concern that's equally matched by Riya whose hair is pulled into an easy side-bun, eyes glazing over in worry.

Amir stands silently, eyes carefully gracing the scene, eyebrows gently raised.

I can't even begin to answer the questions. It's all too fucking overwhelming. My head starts to pound as I try to process everything, but the gears in my mind are stuck, and all I gain in return for my effort is a throbbing headache.

My eyes squeeze shut before they blink, trying to clear my mind.

Amir's eyes soften, and he carefully nudges both girls. And when he turns to me, it's almost like the look in his eyes can practically see how drained I am.

"We'll talk at lunch," Amir says lightly, my two other friends quieting as Amir guides them away. Before leaving, though, Amir turns towards me, eyes careful as he gives me a gentle pat on the shoulder.

And then they're gone, leaving me in the hallway as I attempt to navigate through my own swirling thoughts.

***

When lunch rolls around, I sidle into my usual seat, chin resting on my arms as my eyes flick around the cafeteria. From across the cafeteria, Ellie Evans stares at me from the GSA table. Her lips are pulled into a thin line and I give it my all to pointedly ignore her gaze.

Instead, I focus on the rumble of students, the hunger eating at my stomach and the football players at the center table, shoving each other and letting out barks of laughter as they force one unlucky member to chug down some mystery drink.

Before I can roll my eyes at the sight, someone slides into the seat across from me. However, I don't look up until a plastic bowl of ramen is slid across the table and lands right in front of me.

Amir slides the fork across the table along with it, and Dani slides into the seat next to him, a grin tugging at her lips at the scene.

"Got some chicken noodle soup for you," Dani says, eyes still smiling as Riya plops onto the seat next to me, headphones on as she distractedly cusses while flipping through a massive textbook.