Young Love • Matty Healy

Chap •• Five ••

After a twenty minute walk that Matty claimed would only take five, we finally arrived at the beach. After much complaining and a few games of happy slaps between Matty and Louis, I eventually spot three other familiar faces, in a crowd of strangers, all stood around a huge fire. With one stunning blonde, standing out like a model.

"About time!" That friendly giant of ours called out "been waiting all day to see you"

"You saw me yesterday you knob!" Matty spits playfully.

"I was talking to this one" George corrects him, throwing an arm around me and pulling me in for a bear hug. "Missed you" he mutters, letting go to let Ad and then Ross greet me. They weren't so much huggers, or likely to really show you any form on physical affection. Though Ad did stretch to a high five with me that had me grinning at his awkwardness.

They all greeted Max and then Louis, when I noticed Matty hadn't stuck around, he was gone in a flash. Straight up into the arms of.... her.

That panging feeling hit me in the chest that I was fearing would.

And now I was left tormenting myself, watching them. No matter how much I told myself to stop, I just couldn't.

She really was beautiful. And as much as it did sting to say it, they actually did make a good looking couple.

Immediately Matty's laughter is cursing around us freely. I hadn't heard him laugh like that in so long. It was like he was a different person here, with her.

God, what am i doing? Why am I here? Look at the state of me, stood pining over something that never will be mine, never has been. Standing in this short, slutty dress in a sad, desperate attempt at getting him to just look at me how he did before.

But he hasn't. He won't. He really never will.

I need to just go, leave him to it. I need to go back home, be away from him for a bit. Wait for these ridiculous feelings to pass and die down.

But before I have time to act, I'm startled....

"Get this down you" George says from beside me, holding out a bottle of Bud he'd already opened for me. As though he knew I needed it. As though he'd just had access into my thoughts.

He stands staring off into the same direction as me. Making it known I wasn't being as discrete as I initially thought on where my eye line was stuck.

I took the beer and proceeded to down it all in one go. Not even coming up for air. Once done, I let out the world's largest belch, making George cheer out in amazement and holds up a hand to high five me.

We both stand laughing at my basic lack of manners or feminism for that matter. But hey, this was me. They all knew it. I wasn't going to start pretending or acting like someone I wasn't. Even though my own mind was already now pointing out the massive differences here between me and this girl who still had Matty's full attention.

"Thought you might need another" another voice calls out from the other side of me, Ross. And again, he now joins in watching the Matty and Sarah show in front of us. I smile up at him in appreciation as he passes me a fag. We clink our bottles together and for a while, I feel not only visible but wanted. Truly grateful for these boys in my life. Who were without a doubt, Matty's best mates, their loyalty laid with him, I got and respected that, but look.... they were already showing above and beyond that I could lean on them for some support, just for a little while. Without having to ask.

"Down it, down it, down it!" A load of voices all chanted out, making a racket. I turn to the commotion, rolling my eyes playfully when I spot that brother of mine, obviously needed the attention on him, as always, as Lou and Ad hold upside down as he drinks from the barrel, gaining everyone's respect.

I hear Matty's high pitched laughter, I could pick that laughter out in loud concert room. It was my favourite sound in the world. He stands, winding max up as he continues to run passed him, still hanging upside down as Matty slaps his arse and then runs off. Causing Max to keep shouting "piss off, Man!" "Stop it, will you?!" Everyone else finds it hilarious too. Typical Matty the Joker.

It's only now, when I hear a voice belonging to the only other girl here, saying "hey" close by, that i realise G and Ross have now left my side, left me exposed to the enemy and now I'm left, having to suck in a huge mouthful of oxygen, feeling like I can't breathe, as I'm left to be introduced to the girl I knew nothing about, but was already so jealous of.

"You must be Ally" she smiles. "Heard a lot about you"

I force a smile. Telling myself I was better than the emotions and feelings my body was making me feel I was.

I take in a deep breath, swallow my pride, remembering how happy Matty looked 5 minutes ago when he first saw her. And I guess that was the most important thing. His happiness.

"Yeah, heard a lot about you too, Sarah" I lie.